Uncategorized

  • a a a crab nebula 1 
    a a a music 14 I love music a a a stonehenge a a a Alice 1 Cheshire cat a a a Alice 2 Alice a a a Alice 4 painting the roses red a a a Alice door knob
    The Daily News
    1  Ah, yeesh.

    2  I'm trying like crazy to get this off in the 7 p.m. last night.

    3  I'm obviously doing it.

    4   Cabaret is singing to me from the always vigilant teevee.

    5   Yeesh.

    6   Not what I expected.

    7   Well, I might as well address the Niners once again.

    8   Dudes.

    9   It's now all drivel.

    10  What happened happened.

    11  I free you now to stop.

    12  End it. 

    13  Time to start living again.

    14  Let's change the topic. Time to move on. I look at it like when a show would close. Students would bathe in their glory for one day. Any more than that and everyone around them starts to walk in another direction. You strike a set right after a show for a reason. You can't live there for a week. The world gives you one day, in a pretty grim and unforgiving way. They will sympathize with what you have done, pat you on the back, but that's about it. Families can talk about it forever, of course, but people won't put up with it. So let's move on.

    15    Moving on, Part One: On my end, my students took one of a bazillion bubble tests yesterday.

    16    I proctored, and I was pretty vigilant. 

    17    I was put in a classroom that had only twenty students.

    18    Three teachers proctored. 

    19    Pretty good coverage.

    20    I left me with a little time to read the test.

    21    Almost every single question had something to do with things I taught.

    22    The only two vocabulary words that appeared on the test were words that I taught this year!

    23    I pumped my fist and kissed my arm tattoos.

    24    Might not sound like much to the lay person.

    25    Sidebar: Liza Minnelli was a helluve a sexy actress in her prime. Am I aloud to say that?

    26    Mein herr.

    27    What a performance!

    28    <sigh>
    29    Sometimes. 

    30    I lost track of where I was, and I'm quite certain that this news makes YOU sigh.

    31    So I'll cut my own bragging short. 

    32    What I taught was totally on this bubble test. 

    33    My students who took the test came in thanking me. 

    34    Aw, shucks folks, I'm speechless. 

    35    Made me smile. 

    36    I neither won nor lost a Super Bowl, but I definitely loved that all my work helped those kids. 

    37    Hubris, hubris, hubris. 

    38    Thank the pacing guide, not me. The District told me what to teach and I taught it.

    39    In my own inimitable way.

    40    Okay, hubris, hubris, hubris.

    41    I was so proud of them.

    42    They did it, and I know they did it.

    43    Pretty good coaching, excellent players. 

    44    There was applause, because I insisted they give themselves applause for staying with all my jawing. 

    45    I'm really proud of my students tonight. 

    46    Last night.

    47    This testing throws all of us into some sort of strange schedule that nobody really knows for which to prepare. 
     
    48    One girl came into my room yelling, "Mr. Harrington, they had din on the test, and I knew what it was!!!"
     
    50   Din for the layperson, is excessive noise, as in a classroom.
     
    51   It was on the test. Touchdown.
     
    52   And I'm over the Niners. Clearly. I clean out my locker today.
     
    53    We have another testing day today, and then we return to normal, whatever that is. I won the big one yesterday, which was the English portion. So yeah. I clean out my locker later toda. 
     
    54    So I awakened into the 3 a.m. to finish this thing off, and I must now needs get some sleep. Testing changes one's entire daily routine.
     
    55   So good night world, good night Liza, and good night to all.
     
    56   And good mornin'. 
     
    57    See you again. And yeah, I'm over the Niners. It must be clear as a final whistle.
     
    58   Peace.
     
    ~H~

     

      

  • The Daily News

    1   I'm already over the Niners' stuff.

    2   I have a saloon to run.

    3   It is now into the six p.m. yesterday.

    4   I am a walking dichotomy.

    5   I am over the Niners' stuff, and yet it keeps coming back and to haunt me.

    6   But like most of you, I'm over it.

    7   I'm now into the sunset hour of yesterday.

    8   I'm listening to some Allman Brothers and trying to enjoy Bonnie and Clyde, this weird film from WAY back-in-the-day.

    9   Yay.

    10  The Niners's stuff still haunts me because the stupid media won't stop with their relentless pursuit of all that happened.

    11  <yawn>

    12   Dude it happened. Get over it.

    13   I tend to like what is going on now.

    14   The trouble is, nothing really is.

    15    Honestly, the entire Niner thing is all about this: that was not an ending, it was a beginning.

    16    I'm proud of my Niners, and nobody will ever convince me otherwise.

    17    It was just so bizarre.

    18    Instead, I'm sitting here the night before swaying to some old music and some old movie.

    19    It is sunset. I'm with my puppy Phoebe who is around a hundred-fifty in dog years.

    20    She's my pal.

    21    She's Charley, and Steinbeckian, if there is such a word.

    22    It''s quiet.

    23    It's somewhat reflective.

    24    It's about as bizarre as that game.

    25    I must move silently into the present.

    26    Which is now.

    27    Nobody is home.

    28     Well, nobody except me and Charley.

    29     Bonnie is now reading this horrible poem to Clyde.

    30    In the kitchen the Allman Brothers are playing Desdemona, an awesome blues tune. It's blasting out of my iPod.

    31    My computer just went into CAPS LOCK, one of the most irritating inventions in the history of computers.

    32    The outrageously soulful Desdemona continues to rock my early eve.

    33    I'm still bereaving.

    34    But I trying desperately to keep from saying to myself "Don't Stop Bereaving."

    35    Sorry.

    36    I swear to you.

    37    Yesterday I got in there and taught the kids. I came prepared, and delivered the goods.

    38     It's now into the six p.m. Unusual time for me to be doing this. I prefer my insomniacal three a.m. I just got buzzed on my made-up adjective. Hey. Computer. It's my DN, so I can make up any word I want. 

    39     I'm already over the Niner stuff. Honestly.

    40     The dog is barking at nothing.

    41      Next year, Niners' fans.

    42      Don't stop.

    43     The dog is barking at nothing outside. That's her second round of barking.

    44     Niners' fans: it is just the beginning.

    45     Don't stop bereaving. At least for one more day. It tore my heart out. I feel like something was stolen from me. So you have at least one more day of bereaving. 

    46     But more important, don't stop believing.

    47     Enough of this.

    48     I have a saloon to run.

    49     I'm over it.

    50     Sort of.

    51     I gottago.

    52      Nah. I'm over it.

    53     Enjoy today.

    54     Put everything in perspective, and let us all move forward.

    55     I kept it pretty low key yesterday. I had to. I had to go in and throw the kitchen sink at my students. It was obvious which ones were Niners' fans. They sported their stuff proudly. At the end of each period, I put on Fleetwood Mac's Landslide from their awesome live album The Dance. 

    56   They all gathered their backpacks, zipped things up, stood by the door, and I said, "I want to dedicate this song to all the Niners' fans out there."

    57    Each period, during Lindsay Buckingham's classic solo, the bell rang, and they soldiered out. My heart bled for the kids wearing their stuff, because other kids were in their faces, but they stood proudly. That stuff is tough enough on an adult, let alone a high school kid. 

    58    They remained faithful and they stood tall. Landslide worked perfectly. Some of them needed prompting. 

    59    I said, "This is the song that was played in the Super Bowl commercial that featured the guy hugging his horse." They lit up. "Oh yeah!!!" they smiled.

    60    Well I've been afraid of changes 'cuz I built my life around you. 

    61    Time makes you bolder; children get older and I'm getting older too.

    62    I'm getting older too.

    63    Soldiers.

    64    I gottago. But first I gotta get out of CAPS LOCK once again. Useless invention.

    65    See you again.

    66    Peace. 

    ~H~


    www.xanga.com/bharrington







     

           

  • Thanks for a GREAT Season 

    Niners!!!  We Love You Man!!!


    The Daily News

    1   Niners.

    2   <huge sigh>

    3   No jabbering. I'm tired of listening to jabbering.

    4   Great game.

    5   I KNOW there is much more news, but to me?

    6   Great game.

    7    It was one of the greatest Super Bowls in history. It had absolutely everything.

    8    Did the better team win?

    9    I'll leave that for the ages.

    10   Were we robbed by the no-call?

    11   Clearly.

    12   It is what it is.

    13   We could have scored on a call, but there was still time left.

    14   And the Ravens came to play.  They looked unbeatable. Then WE looked unbeatable.

    15   It's still reeling in my head.

    16   So I'll part early. We should never have had to rely on a no-call. And yet...

    17   28-6 with 12:10 left in the third quarter, and the final score 34-31?

    18   Great game. STRESSFUL game, as my former student, Jason Cuascut put it live from New Orleans. He was at the game. I can't even imagine. 

    19   It's too late to break down the entire game, but the best way to remember this game is that two awesome teams fought to the bitter end. They both proved that there is no such thing as perfection. But they fought, exposing weaknesses, and fighting a bloody battle. 

    20   History will show that these teams were closely matched, that the first half showed how awesome the Ravens were, and the second, how amazing the Niners were, and what both did to get to this game.

    21   I'm fine. I'm not quite equipped to do an in-depth breakdown of the game when it is two hours past my bedtime on a Sunday night.

    22   If I learned anything about this game, it is that the Super Bowl must be moved to a Saturday.

    23   Seriously.

    24   The "seriously" came from my daughter Caitlin.

    25    We need a movement.

    26    Americans worship God on Sundays.

    27    Why interrupt it with such nonsense as the Super Bowl?

    28    Uh..Christians? Rise up dudes. Make some noise. 

    29    The Super Bowl is becoming more important than God. And that is not right.

    30     John Lennon forgot to say, "And that is not right."

    31     But I digress.

    32     Who's with me?

    33      Move the Super Bowl to Saturday.

    34      If anything came out of this game, it's that two teams run by the sons of the same parents fought and fought and fought. 

    35     They looked like mythical gods. They were powerful, but showed a lot of human weaknesses. Strange gods, but gods we worship, if we are true sports' fans. I'm not EVEN gonna lie. That's what we do. 

    36     Our strange gods should be worshiped on Saturday.

    37     Somebody else embrace that cause. I'm too exhausted to even think about it.

    38     Even to think.

    39     Normal human games are okay to be played on Sundays. 

    40     The Super Bowl should be moved to Saturday. It is the ultimate sporting event. Let's allow people to recover on Sunday. Let's let people go to church on Sundays, and remain focused. 

    41   Let's let atheists and agnostics be free to relax on Sundays. 

    42   I hope you are taking this all with tongue planted firmly in cheek. 

    43   Great game. 

    44   Congrats to the Ravens for a great battle. 

    45   And congrats to the 49ers for a great season. 

    46   Have a great Monday.

    47   It should be Sunday, but whatevs.

    48   Fly low.

    49   Peace.

    ~H~


    www.xanga.com/bharrington







  • LET'S GO NINERS!!!!
     
    The Daily News

    1   NINERS!!!!

    2   Lovez me some Sharks, some Giants, some Warriors, and all other Bay Area sports, but come now.

    3   It's ALL about the NINERS this weekend.

    4   Let's send our team all the support we can!

    5    Sorry all you squealers and naysayers. 

    6    We have the best team in the NFL, bar none.

    7    We have suffered fools.

    8     We have been to the mountaintop five times, and come away with five rings. 

    9    And we are going to go into New Orleans and get our sixth.

    10   Finally.

    11   Will it be easy?

    12   Should be, but anything can happen on a Super Sunday.

    13   Is there enough champagne?

    14   Probably not.

    15   The only news happening right now on this rag is the Super Bowl.

    16   Sixteen items and out!

    17    Peace.

    ~H~



    www.xanga.com/bharrington
















  • The Daily News

    1   I just woke up thinking once again that this was already written.

    2   Curses!

    3   Ah, whatevs.

    4   I went through a "The past is prologue" things yesterday.

    5   Do you ever have that song "Who are you?" drift through your frabjous brain?

    6   That happened to me yesterday, for a brief stint.

    7    I was at meetings until almost 6 p.m. They all reminded me of where I've been and where I am now. 

    8   Fifteen million people having meetings about how to teach. 

    9    I don't think I've ever changed my style because of meetings, or data, or new discoveries which inevitably become old discoveries. 

    10  At meetings, you always hear stuff like this: "They're going to want to see this. They're going to want to see that."

    11  It's a very very very old hat. 

    12   Yesterday I had a conversation with this student who comes in at lunch each day to do her homework. I told her that I had meetings beginning right after lunch and going all the way into the early evening. 

    13  One meeting in particular I was disturbed about because I don't always play by the rules, as anyone who knows me will attest. 

    14   I knew one meeting was going to be me and an administrator who was going to give me a slight slap on the wrist for not crossing all my T's and dotting all my I's. 

    15   I usually dot my T's and cross my eyes, which inevitably pisses people off. 

    16   I was clearly a bit stressed about having this one-on-one, even though I knew that this administrator was a class act. 

    17   In the midst of stressing over that meeting, the student looked up from her studies and said, "You're the best teacher at this school, by far."

    18   I don't believe that, not for a minute. 

    19   I said, "I don't know about that. I have colleagues who are awesome, although I haven't seen many of them teach. I admire them as professionals and as good, caring teachers."

    20  I assume that all teachers have their fans. 

    21  I do know one thing.

    22  I do know that an effective teacher must love teaching. They must love their job, and if they don't, then they're in the wrong profession. 

    23   I especially loved teaching a Yerba Buena. I ran into a whole bunch of my former colleagues last night at the meeting. 

    24   One teacher is now working at Independence, and mentioned Ponch. He is the maestro extraordinaire over at Indy. 

    25   We fell into brief conversation about teaching. I said, "Ponch and I had an answer to the statement that teachers always hear, which is this: 'I can't see how anyone can be a teacher.' " People say that all the time. "I can't see how anyone can be a teacher." Ponch had a great answer.

    26   His answer, and our answer: "Beats workin'!" A double take and a Three Stooges moment. Always happens when I'm with that guy. 

    27   Pat answer.

    28   Whatever that means.

    29   On my way home I thought of how much I love the profession, even though it drives me crazy with all its accountability experts. 

    30   With all of my training over the years, I still think that the best teachers are the ones who are excited every single day about going in and teaching. 

    31   I still don't think I'm anywhere near the teacher I would like to be.

    32   I've gotten near; I know that. 

    33   It sounds a bit cliche, but I've "mellowed" with age. 

    34   This means that I don't demand respect by throwing chairs across rooms, or throwing hissy fits. I don't cuss. If I get upset, the worst thing I might do is say, "Excuse me," and I'll walk out of the room for a minute. 

    35   I really try to keep things moving, and I smile, even if upset. 

    36   The best advice I ever received about teaching came from my first principal, Dr. John Hernandez, right after he hired me. I asked him what advice he would give to a fresh, new teacher. His advice: "Be genuine."

    37   Brilliant.

    38   Sometimes there are ordinary people who walk into our lives and give us awesome advice, and we are too stupid to realize the brilliance. 

    39   "Be genuine."

    40   Fancy that. 

    41   Eight billion accountability idiots looking at data and all, and one gentle soul tells me everything I need to know about teaching in two words.

    42   Iono.

    43   I had a long day yesterday. I went all the way into the early evening having people at meetings trying every which way to make heads or tails about all of this. 

    44   Why do I teach?

    45   Beats workin'.

    46   And I believe in "Be genuine."

    47   It just ain't that hard. 

    48   Well, it's getting late. Or early. 

    49   Whatevs.

    50   It's once again well into the four a.m. so I think I'll crawl under some covers, close my eyes, and slumber for a bit. 

    51   Enjoy your Thursday.

    52   I already know that I will. 

    53   See you again. Be genuine.

    54    Peace.

    ~H~


    www.xanga.com/bharrington

















      

  • a a a Giants 9 The Kid 

     a a a spy v spy 1a a a King Kong 1 Fay Wray a a a King Kong 2 Empire State Building attack a a a King Kong 3 Fay Wray a a a Brooks 3 Sign This

     a a a wheels 1 the wheels have come off 

    a a a einstein 1 a a a Jimmy Durante a a a peter pan and wendy a a a crab nebula 1 a a a starbucks 1 a a a dn 1 a a a cap 1 Colin Kaepernick a a a journey 3 popeye a a a monster 3 a a a monster 6 elephant a a a monster 5 screaming citizens a a a Alice 1 Cheshire cat a a a fly low 1 two planes The Daily News

    1   My day has been booked for me.

    2   Lately I have had the fortune of having everyone on Earth booking my dance card.

    3   I'm just rolling with it, but it is officially annoying.

    4   Yesterday I got my entire lunch booked for today. That means that I have work, and then meetings from now until 6 p.m.

    5   Can't wait.

    6   It's okay. I will probably bring some performance-enhancing drugs, like Crystal Light and baloney.

    7   What else can I be?

    8   Sometimes I feel I'm being stalked.

    9   At my age, that's pretty flattering.

    10  I've learned to be patient with all of this.

    11  Everybody else's world seems more important than my own.

    12  Sound familiar? I speak on behalf of Everyman/Everywoman.

    13  What do you expect from 2013?

    14  Everybody has to work twice as hard for some reason.

    15  Of course, I think it's all a conspiracy to turn us into zombies.

    16  Whatevs.

    17  I (We) no longer sleep. I just nap at intervals in order to please the rest of the world.

    18  The rest of the world.

    19  What the world needs is a good night's sleep.

    20   When I talk about my own world, by the way, I'm talking about all of our worlds.

    21   We have what I have called "scramblers" in our lives.

    22   Scramblers are people who wish to pencil us in on their dance cards. They think nothing of taking our time away from us. They are everywhere in the working world. They put us on constant Stacy Alert.

    23   Never mind.

    24   Reference to a grand old movie.

    25   Wayne's World is officially a grand old movie.

    26   I can't quite call it a classic, because it isn't black and white.

    27   The entire concept of Stacy Alerts is charming.

    28   Stacy is symbolic of anybody who comes walking at you that you want to avoid.

    29   Scramblers.

    30   I'm not even sure it's a good word, but somebody had to put a word to it.

    31   I got scrambled like crazy yesterday. I already had this day scrambled due to a monthly meeting I somehow got myself into. That's the one that takes me into the six p.m.

    32   My only break today got booked for me through a phone call I was idiotic enough to take yesterday.

    33  Good person, but booked my only break of the day for a meeting.

    34   I technically don't have to go to it.

    35   But it's a person who works really hard, and I am willing to sacrifice.

    36   So sometimes scramblers are good people. They just think nothing of kidnapping your time.

    37   And this week is especially booked, since I had not only the meeting that runs until 6, but a weekend taking care of my Dad, culminating in a Super Bowl party on Sunday, more than likely at his house, which is an hour away.

    38  That's a lot of hours not home taking care of business.

    39   I decided to ride this rollercoaster, because somewhere in all of this is an element of good deeds and fun.

    40  Today, however, is going to be murder. Three meetings.

    41  Here's something you might not know about me. I hate meetings. I don't hate too much in this life, but meetings destroy me.

    42   I realize they are necessary to any business or institution, because everything revolves around accountability.

    43   It always reminds me of Mel Brooks in Blazing Saddles. He is the governor, and his jacket says "Gov" on the back. He calls a meeting with his constituents and opens with the classic line, "Gentlemen, we have to protect our phony-baloney jobs!"

    44   Ah, perfect.

    45   So I simply have to go in today with that message, and then avoid Stacies.

    46   I assume that is the plural spelling of Stacy.

    47   Well.

    48   I've certainly gotten off to a good start.

    49   It is now into the four a.m. and I'm booked for the next twelve hours.

    50   I don't mind an attempted escape right now.

    51   Gottago. Scramblers. Stacies.

    52   They steal your world.

    53   I think if I escape now that I'll be fine.

    54   I hope you learned something in all of this.

    55   That's my job; that's my nature: hoping people learn things.

    56   It takes a lifetime to learn things, and what you learn is that you never learn.

    57    Gottago.

    58    Have a GREAT day. Keep an eye out for scramblers. 

    59   See you again.

    59   Peace.

    ~H~

    a a a cool guy 1

    www.xanga.com/bharrington


  • The Daily News

    1   I tried writing this yesterday afternoon and it was useless.

    2   It absolutely must be in the middle of the night, or nothing.

    3   I read what I wrote and it was idiotic.

    4   I won't trouble you with the topic, because it was inane. I decided to do my usual routine, which worked out much better.

    5   I awakened at around 3:30 a.m. and had just fallen down a deep hole into my own Wonderland. Cheshire cats, teapots, and freshly painted red roses.

    6   A Disney DN had written itself before my feet hit the floor.

    7   The deal is, my last class of the day completely rocked and understood my lesson.

    8   A few of them angered me because they came in late, and they were on cell phones at the beginning of my lecture. 

    9   Instead of getting angry, I merely stated that they needed to get to my class on time, and that they needed not to be texting while I was trying to help them get smarter. 

    10  They sheepishly put away the phones, and some even apologized for coming in late.

    11  Last class of the day. 

    12  I then gave them a tip on how to get on Amazon and to buy a Warriner's grammar book for under six dollars. Warriner's is THE grammar book that has been used to help people speak well for what seems like centuries. Despite that, it still didn't land safely on quite a number of people. But my students tuned in yesterday.

    13  I then had them take a paragraph from a piece of literature and write the parts of speech over the top of each word. 

    14   To the layperson, that doesn't sound like much, but to a teacher, it was absolutely startling.

    15   I walked around the classroom and heard comments like, "That's an adjective, fool!" Or "What part of speech is 'that'?" Pronoun or adjective, depending on the use.

    16   It was a grammatical Wonderland. They taught each other the entire time. I tried interfering, but they weren't interested. They taught each other. I'll state that again: they taught each other. And it worked. 

    17   Baby steps. 

    18   Speaking correctly is making a comeback, at least in my classes.

    19   A perfect period of teaching took place yesterday afternoon. The students engaged in teaching, arguing, and asking me to referee. They climbed over each other, often trying to outdo one another. 

    20   Oh, it might not seem like much, but it was clear that these guys were miles ahead of their peers in terms of understanding how our language is supposed to work. 

    21   They knew every part of speech and how it was working in sentences. They understood complex things about writing. 

    22   They asked REALLY good questions, such as, "What part of speech is 'else,' as in "anybody else?"
    23   I had to think, because I refuse to rely on teachers' copies of books. I pride myself in working through those sorts of complex questions so that I am working as hard as the students. 

    24   Hopefully I'm right here, but I figured that "else" was an adjective. 

    25   To the layperson, this stuff isn't important. But I have to fight things like, "I ate a olive yesterday." Grammar is almost extinct. It is "an olive" fool.

    26    Or "Yesterday I had ran downtown." <basketball buzzer> Uh...it's "had run." We no longer teach these things. We don't have the books. Grammar is disappearing at an alarming rate. Alot is becoming one word. It isn't. It is two words. A lot. But yesterday my students were getting it. They were almost addicted to correctness. I was in the middle of some sort of cartoon.

    27    Wonderland. Quite a cartoony dream. 

    28    At one point, some student yelled the *f* word. Just barked it in the middle of all the learning. Everything stopped, and all eyes went to me.

    29    The class knew I wasn't kidding around, and fell silent. I happened to be standing at my podium, a thug in a gangsta hat with a crease in his cheek. Pure silence. Tension. In Facebookease: that awkward moment when you shout something at the exact time everybody else is suddenly silent. 

    30   I spoke.

    31   "I assume that was one of those accidental blurts that sometimes happen to all of us. I will make some lemonade then." I didn't even point out the student, nor did I send him out of the room.

    32   I had the parts of speech written on the board.

    33   Continuing.

    34   "You just saved me a little time. What you just blurted out is called an interjection. An interjection is the first thing you say when you accidentally hit your thumb with a hammer. You say things like, "Ouch!" "Doggone-it!" "Oh fudge!"

    35   Corny stuff. Unease.

    36   "You also say things like, "Well..." or "Oh!" 

    37    I looked over their heads. I grew taller. 

    38    "Interjections are interesting in that they have absolutely no grammatical purpose or function. We just say them. They exist outside all logic of language. But they are a part of this beautiful thing that we call language. So I'm not at all very angry about a little slip; it happens to all of us, and it usually happens when everybody falls silent at once. Let's just remember that we are in a classroom."

    39   "You may continue with your teaching."

    40    Awesome moment. 

    41    In my earlier days I may have handled that a lot worse. I may have gone off on the kid and berated him. I might have thrown him out of the room. I might have even hurled a dictionary in his direction.

    42    I knew he had just slipped. It's human. I knew that. He was scared to death, because he just happened to yell that at the same time the class silenced. That is one of the designs of life. It has happened to so many of us. 

    43   So we all blew it off, and they returned to arguing about seemingly insignificant things like verbs, adverbs, and all things that train our thinking. 

    44   We older folks take it for granted that we can speak well.

    45   Well, not good. My students understand the difference, and the correctness.

    46   It may sound a bit nerdy, but that is why I awakened into the three a.m. 
    falling down a hole into a cartoony wonderland. 

    47    I had originally tried writing this stuff yesterday afternoon. It wasn't the same. My theme was "lousy hot dog buns." I was going to call it something fluky like "Malice in Bunderland."

    48   Not the same. I absolutely must deadline this thing in the middle of the night, when everything is strange. 

    49   Right before I wrote this I was in dreamland. I was literally in a cartoon, with lush colors, teapots, Cheshire cats, an ocean of turquoise tears, yellow skeleton keys, and red paint.
    50   There are worse things.

    51   May I depart with a request?

    52   Speak correct in front of younger people.

    53   Correctly.

    54   Let's all join forces to bring elegance back. 

    55   That's all.

    56    Have a wonderful Tuesday.

    57    Stay classy.

    58    Peace.

    ~H~



    www.xanga.com/bharrington













  • The Daily News

    1   "You're perfectly mad!"

    2    I'm into the 4 a.m. once again, and some old film or other is flickering in front of me. I was setting up for the writing of this nonsense, heard that line, and lifted a smile.

    3    I swear on a stack of bibles that I have no idea what movie it is, or anything about it.

    4    Frankly, I don't really wish to find out. It is one of about a million I watch each night/morning.

    5    I don't really watch them. They are sort of like night lights with black-and-white visuals and sound that sometimes cracks. 

    6    I wake up to 2013, when nobody says things like "You're perfectly mad!"

    7    Or "Oh, my darling, I love you!"

    8    I enjoy my night lights.

    9    I enjoy going to sleep early, and then awakening to a heater, a blanket, and an old movie.

    10   I enjoy movies with people moving swiftly along rainy streets.

    11   I enjoy umbrellas.

    12    I enjoy my time of day. Somewhere in the middle of the night, I imagine. It's as though I have taken my hand and stopped the world. 

    13   "I can't marry you. I don't know your name!"

    14    Only deep into the 4 a.m. would you hear an almost tag line like that coming off the screen. That was the second-to-the-last line in said unknown film. I didn't catch the tag line. But that was the line going into the tag line. It doesn't get any better than that.

    15   Ah, the joys of insomnia.

    16   Who knew it would come to this?

    17   What most people don't understand about insomnia is that it can not only be controlled, it can be engaging.

    18   It feels as though I have slipped through the cracks of the insanity through which we all live, and given sweet, precious moments for myself.

    19   If that sounds a bit selfish, so be it. 

    20    I have these scant wee hours to relax. Most people have no concept of relaxation.

    21   They get flustered, and try to force it with weekends that often don't go the way they would like. Or with stressing the entire time they try to relax. 

    22   I used to laugh at that. I would see people who would be ridiculously impatient on vacations.

    23   Ever see people on the freeways during the summer?

    24   They are more nervous trying to escape the madness than when they are when working.

    25    They tailgate other drivers. They roll down their windows and shout at the car in front of them, "Come on you idiot! Can't you see that I'm in a hurry to relax????" It is almost comical, were it not so dangerous. Morons. No escaping them. 

    26    I'm awake for the day. 

    27    I had an extremely stressful weekend. I had to go under the hood of the DN and do a repair job.

    28    I had tons of grading to do. That's always a pleasure. 

    29    I had to plan lessons for what is going to be a stressful week.

    30    I had people at work barking at me for things I didn't do to make their lives easier. 

    31    I had to help family.

    32    I watched my own work stack up.

    33    And I fought it all. 

    34    By the time I went to sleep, I had conquered all of that boushit.

    35    I went to sleep early, and I am now completely awake, refreshed, and ready for the day.

    36   Healthy, not wealthy, but quite wise still. 

    37   I look around my cozy living room, see that everything is organized and ready for the coming week, and smile, like Joe-the-Bear, who sits in peace on a whatnot.

    38   A whatnot is a piece of furniture that has a system of shelves that holds figurines, pictures, and whatnot.

    39   Last week I gave that as a vocabulary word. 

    40   It was from some extinct short story by Mark Twain. 

    41    I had never really read it until last week. It's this charming little piece called The Californian's Tale. Most people have never heard of it. 

    42    It's about a gold miner still hanging around California some years after the gold rush. He comes upon a former miner named Henry, whose house, unlike all the abandoned ones, looks pretty, and has flowers and paint, and is absolutely beautiful. Henry is waiting for his lovingly gorgeous wife to return from visiting relatives. 

    43    The narrator becomes engaged when he sees a picture of Henry's wife, who looks absolutely charming.

    44    I won't give the plot away, as I know there are readers out there who might enjoy this remarkable gem. 

    45   If a guy like me uses the word "charming" twice in the four a.m. you know the story has charm. 

    46   I teach seasonally.

    47   This story is truly about the real forty-niners.

    48   And Twain uses the term "whatnot" as a piece of furniture that holds knick-knacks.

    49   I am convinced that very few people in 2013 would know that.

    50   We have a couple of whatnots in the very room from where I am writing at this moment. 

    51   They hold small figurines, beautiful pictures of all things past, and the venerable Joe-the-Bear.

    52   I just tried taking a picture of Joe-the-Bear but it was too dark, and he looked ghastly. When I have a bit more time, I'll share him. He is gallant, and quite the gentleman. He just hangs out with this look that is a replicates me. 

    53   He is the gentleman I always hope to be. I look up to Joe-the-Bear. 

    52   Well, some other movie is on, and is winding down. I've heard the word "darling" more than I have perhaps ever. It must be darling night on TCM.

    53   It is now approaching the five a.m. when the clock radio blares at me with unimportant suddenness, reminding me of 2013. I push this ten-minute button that hushes all the trash out there, and  I close my eyes and think about more pleasurable things, like Mark Twain, whatnots, and Joe-the-Bear. It will pop on in ten more minutes with massive news of still more misery,and I will again pop it on the head, silence it, and I will attempt to think of niceties.

    54   By the second or third pop, they will have reached sports news, and I will rest my eyes 'til it is time to jump back into all the madness that is 2013. 

    55   I will then have coffee, edit this nonsense, and walk into my week tanned, rested, and ready. The art of insomnia, beautifully orchestrated.

    56   It might not be for everybody, but it works for me.

    57   Enjoy your Monday. Fly low.

    58   See you again.

    59   Peace.

    ~H~

    www.xanga.com/bharrington




  • The Daily News
    1  I missed a deadline yesterday.

    2   I have two DN's done, but evidently I pushed some wrong button on the first one.

    3   Both were brilliant.

    4   But I pushed a wrong button.

    5   Ironically, the theme of both was about how inanimate objects slap us around.

    6   I can't go into details because I suddenly have no control over the look of the DN.

    7   This happened once before. 

    8   It is out of control. This DN, for example, can't even have the classic The Daily News heading. Won't let me. 

    9   I have no control over the look, the pics, the fonts, or anything. 

    10  I can't do anything on it any longer. 

    11  I do this in the middle of the night, so I have no time to figure it all out.

    12  This DN is just me trying to convey that to the masses. 

    13  I don't know that I have the wherewithal to fix it. 

    14  I might be down for a while, which has NEVER happened. 

    15  Ironically, I had begun writing a fun little history of the YB Drama Workshop.

    16  I wrote part one the other night, and part two last night.

    17  Part one had been finished and ready to launch when a poem disappeared
    just as I pressed "save changes."

    18  It was actually public and on Facebook when I did a final edit right before
    going to work and saw that pictures had disappeared, the poem disappeared, the
    text went horizontally north for about four miles, and it looked ridiculously
    undone, like morning robes and hair.

    19  I'm writing right now to send a sort of "pardon our dust" thing, even though I did
    nothing to make this horror happen. 

    20  I'm fine with it, but it just means I have to look under the hood and see what is 
    going on. It's like trying to look at the engine of an old jalopy. 

    21  I'm in an old movie, I swear. Think classic films, and some guy riding in an old
    jalopy, loving the afternoon and when suddenly the engine makes a loud noise, and
    suddenly starts smoking and farting. I pull over on some country road, lift the hood,
    and get hit in the face by a stream of oil. 

    22  I take a handkerchief out, wipe off my face, look around, and a tire blows. 

    23   That's where we are with the good ol' DN.

    24   It is out in the middle of nowhere, sitting in some weeds with a faulty engine and 
    a flat tire. 

    25    I've no way of fixing it 'til the weekend, which is already booked with all sorts of 
    other things. 

    26   I love writing the DN, because it is history, and it is so simple, and it is such a lark. 

    27   It's me at my maddest madness during the witching hour. 

    28   But it is not working, let me tellya. 

    29   And I have spent two nights trying to fix it, to no avail.

    30   I'll work on it, but meanwhile, pardon my dust. 

    31   I'll do everything in my power to get this up and running again, but
    it may take some time. 

    32    And energy, which is beginning to run on empty.

    33   AnywayZ...

    34   As I wrote "AnywayZ..." some actress in some old movie just said, "Anyway..." 

    35   Perfect coincidence at a perfect moment. 

    36   Anyway...

    37   I guess the best I could do right now is to wish you all a good weekend.

    38   We'll see you again. 

    39   All apologies. I think I'll have this thing licked before the day is over. Might even write a second, 'cuz I owe you one. 

    40   So yeah. See you again; I'm convinced of that.

    41   Peace.

    ~H~



    www.xanga.com/bharrington










  •  
    The Daily News
    1   I'm watching an old movie from 1968 called The Split right now. It stars among other people the great Cleveland Brown running back Jim Brown. They just had a scene where discussion of an upcoming playoff game happens. Ticket prices: $5.50 to $8.00. Brown is stalking the vendors and the concession stands, watching all the open cash that is exchanged.

    2   The playoff game is at the Coliseum, and is between the Los Angeles Rams and the Atlanta Falcons. The Rams win the game 20-3. I enjoyed watching the Falcons lose. 

    3   Brown needs money.

    4   He decides it might be a good idea to rob the ticket booths. The upcoming game can evidently fit 80,000 people. It can actually hold 93,607. I looked it up. Who knew?

    5   Pretty low-budget stuff. He decides to "audition" different thugs, most of whom were relatively big stars at the time: Brown, of course, Ernest Borgnine, Jack Klugman, Diahann Carroll, Julie Harris, James Whitmore, and even an actress named Beverly Hills. Gene Hackman plays a corrupt police detective. Everybody is crooked. I couldn't care less about any of the characters. 

    6   I got a bit hooked by the fact they were watching the vendors. The program vendor at the beginning of the film had individual dollars folded in each finger, quite the way to hold money back in 1968. 

    7   As a former stadiu vendor, I realized rather quickly that facing money in the palm of the hand works much better and much faster when selling programs, and that guys who would do that were doing it more for show than anything else. All vendors work on commission, and our commission was 20%, which meant we had to move swiftly and accurately.  

    8  The trouble with finding this all-star film into the 3 a.m. is that I'm trying to watch it and write this stuff at the same time. 

    9   I do like the premise of the film, since I was in that business for years. 

    10  Not a good idea to try to rob those guys. Trust me. It isn't the store's money; it's their money. They can get pretty protective pretty quickly. I worked with a guy one time who had a gun in his duffle bag. It scared me, but he was a gun guy, and said if anyone even came close... 

    11  Yeesh. 

    12   And this was "back-in-the-day."

    13   In the film, the seven or eight guys in on the robbery have all sorts of doo-dads and gadgets that can help them wire up the Coliseum, which already looks old and dingy. I'm convinced that whatever wiring they may have tried wouldn't work in a concrete stadium. 

    14   The total amount they wish to run off with: $500,000.  I don't know if the math adds up if tickets to a playoff game are $5.50 to $8.00. 

    15   Seems a little high. They would have to get all of the money.

    16   Or not. 

    17   These guys are real thugs. 

    18   Some of the stuff in the film is pretty accurate. The money bags have locks on them, just like the real deal. The vending set-up and money rooms look right.

    19   Anyway, greed gets the best of everyone in this story, which is fairly accurate about the vending profession. A lot of guys aren't greedy, but the ones who are...another "yeesh."

    20   This is why it isn't a good idea ever to attempt something like this. I know some guys who would have killed their mothers if someone tried to rob their stand. 

    21   One time I stupidly chased some miscreant fan who tried to steal two mini-baseball bats. How stupid was I? Pretty stupid. This guy stole small weapons and ran down the ramp. I jumped over the table and chased him yelling, "I'll call the police!" To my astonishment the guy came back up the ramp, gave me the bats and ran off. 

    22   My partner looked at me like I had twelve heads. "That guy could have cracked your skull with those bats."

    23   I felt like an idiot, but I also took one for the team. 

    24   Two $7.00 bats. My delicious greed almost got me killed. 

    25   Anyway, here's the plot of this film, which is pretty low-budget. It's from Imbd.

    A pair of crooks conspire to rob the ticket booth at the Los Angeles Coliseum during a Rams game. Before they can perform the heist, the two must find precisely the right henchmen to join them. Each potential gang member must undergo a rigorous test of skill. Thanks to care and precise planning, the caper comes off smoothly and afterward the gang leader (Jim Brown) hides the money in the apartment of his ex-wife (Diahann Carroll). She only agrees to keep the money on the provision that he reform so they can get back together. Unfortunately, the wife's lust-crazed landlord (James Whitmore) busts into her house the next day and tries to rape her. During the struggle he kills her and then takes the loot. Later a crooked cop (Gene Hackman) investigates. Meanwhile, when the gang members learn that the loot is missing, they suspect a double-cross and engage in a huge battle. The cop finds the money and at first keeps it for himself. The head crook eventually figures out that the cop has it and so goes to him to make a little deal. (courtesy of IMDb)

    26  Pretty small-time stuff, but somehow with an all-star cast. 


    Nolte in Teachers, a 1984 film 
    that comes closer to the real deal
    than most people think.

    27  I've seen films about schools and teachers, and don't recall ever seeing anything close to the real deal with the possible exception of the 1984 classic Teachers, starring Nick Nolte. The Split does show a bit of accuracy of how the money circulates at a football game, although if it was a playoff game, I don't know that it would have been quite as easy to pull off a heist. There has always been extra security at large events.

    28   They escape in an ambulance that somehow makes it through the traffic. That would never happen at Candlestick Park, which becomes Beijing after a game. Those guys would have been stuck in two-hour traffic with their take. 

    29   Anyway, I think I would rather watch a film about vending than I would one about teaching. I think the concept is interesting, but that the characters one meets in that profession are much more interesting than the stock low-budget crooks in this film. 

    30  My favorite part of vending was the different characters I worked with, people from all walks of life, most of whom get hooked on at least one team. It was a hard job, but one filled with fun times, great games, huge concerts, and lots of laughs. 

    31   Zany stuff. 

    32   Hard workers. 

    33   Lots of wiseguys. Lots of characters, that's for sure.

    34   Sensational memories. 

    35    Do I miss it? 

    36    A little. Working the seats was always fun, good exercise, and being right in the thick of it. 

    37    Tough on the body though. 

    38    Up and down steps for three or so hours. 

    39     For the record, souvenirs makes WAY more money than selling anything in the seats. It's a long day, because you are essentially setting up your own little store, and you are accountable for every single piece of merch, which takes a LOT of time, so they are long days, and if your stand comes up short, YOU and your partner or partners pay. 

    40   Tremendous money when times are good. I can't begin to imagine what my friends are making this season, what with the Giants, A's, and Niners having good seasons. It's probably pretty high. 

    41   Anyway, I thought it was fun to take a glimpse at the film. It was really not a great film, but a film about the vending life would be pretty interesting. It is the world of entertainment and sports turned inside out. I have even worked the circus.

    42  Well, I am into the 4 a.m. and have another long day, with meetings all the way 'til six, so I think I'm going to pull up to the curb, park, and get me some sleep.

    43   Have a GREAT day!

    44   See you again.

    45   Peace.

    ~H~

    www.xanga.com/bharrington









bharrington

Recent Posts

Recent Comments

Categories