Month: October 2012

  • How to Help Hurricane Sandy Victims
    www.redcross.org/charitable-donations or text Red Cross to 90999

     
    Happy Halloween!!!

    The Daily News  
     
     
     1  I’d like to start out today’s DN by throwing prayers and thoughts out to our neighbors on the East Coast. Hurricane Sandy has lived up to her hype. I’m into the 3 a.m. watching the news coming to us and it is absolutely devastating.  We are all thinking of you.

    2   I can’t even imagine. 

    3   I’m staring at my teevee shaking my head in absolute astonishment. 

    4   The amount of area affected is unutterably amazing. 
    5    All I can do, or we can do at least for now is to throw our thoughts and prayers out there, and donate money. Just avoid scams. Check the newspapers for the charity of your choice. And pray. 

    6   Moving On, Part One: Yesterday’s Heidi Chronz worked.

    7   It had to be one of the best ever, and it isn’t over.

    8   It started out REALLY slow yesterday. Because of DN delays in the morning, I found myself rushing to get this written and all the materials to the Theatre on time. 

    9   I had finished writing this, and then was in a tizzy trying to get the flashlights, lamps, notes, etc. all together. I make it look easier than it is, but it does take some time to get the Theatre set up for the ghost stories. 

    10  I have a bulleted list of the Chronz so that I can sequence them and remind myself of all the stories that have happened each Halloween. I sent it to my printer about fifteen minutes before I departed, but my computer said there was no wireless connection. 

    11  I didn’t need that material yesterday; I just wanted my entire game to be on for the entire mini-unit.

    12  So I gathered all my bags, lamps, sound effects, etc. but found that my flashlight works intermittently, which to me means one thing: it is broken and useless. 

    13  Since I do a dark lighting design for the Chronz, a powerful flashlight is essential to safety. In an emergency, I need to get to the worklights, which I can reach in five seconds with a good flashlight. 

    14   Anyway, I gathered my stuff, and was perched at the front door  ready to head to the school when I heard some clicking. 

    15  The  printer had suddenly come alive, and the Heidi Chronz printed, and then stopped. It was right out of the Twilight Zone. 

    16   I left quickly, and didn’t even touch that paper.

    17   I arrived late, and my first class had to help me set up. They didn’t have many stories, and I had to carry a lot of the period.

    18   Nothing really to report. 

    19   My next period was entirely different. I adjusted the lighting design so that it looked pretty scary. The students came into a dark Theatre, and from there it became a Disney ride. I hearded them in through a dark Theatre and got them to the stage, which had an awesomely speckled light design, complete with semi green cyc glowing lowly in the background. I had a flickering lantern in front of me. The setting worked perfectly. And the students brought it. 

    20   That class started out with stories of their own. Students had practiced their stories, and had some amazing ones. 

    21   Two stories involved ones and nines. Traditionally ones and nines have been connected with the stories. 

    22   It turned cold. 

    23   The stories worked. I had to do very little talking. This always makes it the students’ day, and they delivered.

    24  During break I actually drove back up to my room from the student parking lot in order to save time taking roll. 

    25  When I got back, the door going into the house left side of the Theatre was locked, so I had to go over to the door going into the house right side, a door I never use. 

    26   Taped to the door was this picture:

     

    27  Keep in mind that I do not run this Theatre. The picture at the bottom of the sign is the same picture I have been planting at the bottom of each DN for the past couple of weeks. 

    28  I was blown away. Let this one sink in. The odds of David, our drama director, choosing that picture are astronomical. He does not read the DN. He doesn’t even know it exists. 

    29  Just thought I’d share. There was much more, but too much to report here, especially into the 4 a.m. 

    30  I definitely wanted to throw yet another coincidence, and line it up with the other coincidences I have not only reported, but that I had predicted. 

    31  I have reported coincidences since this school year started, and I have just reported the tip of the iceberg. I have had more this year than any other year. One day I had four, and could only remember three. 

    32   But yesterday, right after the Heidi Chron sheet came out of the printer, and right after one of the most amazing session of stories in the history of my doing this, I was detoured to that sign on the door. 

    33  If you get that, then you get the idea. 

    34  If not, nothing I can do. The next period the Theatre turned cold. The stories by the next few classes were off the charts scary. 

    35  We continue in the classroom today, but I didn’t want to use the Theatre today because of shortened periods. 

    36  Tomorrow I’m going to tell the entire story, complete with Great Moments With Mr. Lincoln, Disneyland, Titanic, babies crying on headphoes, and all the rest. 

    37  Many DN readers are familiar with these stories, and many have been a part of these stories. 

    38  I’ll try to keep you posted. 

    39   Some day I hope to archive all of them, all of the thousands of coincidences, cold temperatures, rappings, tappings, and all the rest. 

    40   For now, I have a saloon to run. 

    41   Moving on, Part the Thoid: I hope a lot of you Giants’ fans are able to ditch work and enjoy the parade today. I so want to be a part of that, but I am in the midst of this amazing unit on the strange and eerie in literature. 

    42   So I’m gonna go in full force. 

    43   Meanwhile, I’m watching the news and thinking of you all out there who are dealing with Sandy. I wish you all my love and prayers. 

    44  We’ll see you again.

    45   Peace.

    ~H~


    www.xanga.com/bharrington

     







  • WORLD CHAMPIONS!!!

     



    The Daily News

    1       “Detroit probably didn’t know what it was in for. Our guys had a date with destiny.”
                                                                                                                  –Bruce Bochy
    2    What a night.

    3    It went late.

    4    It had to.

    5    Pablo gets MVP.

    6    That almost seemed weird. 

    7     When a TEAM wins, then the team should be the MVP.

    8     What I love is that the East Coast is somehow bewildered that the best team in baseball won the World Series in four. 

    9    The other night some guy said that the Giants were just lucky. 

    10   Come, good sir. Did you watch the games?  

    11   What’s funny is that the right team won. 

    12   Unquestionably.  Here is a quote by Tiger’s manager Jim Leyland: “They were better than we were. And you can’t say anything different. I mean, if it goes seven games and you lose the seventh game on a freak play or something, you might say, well, we were as good as they were. But in this Series, we were not as good as they were. They did a fantastic job. They’re the world champions, and they deserve to be the world champions.”

    13    I thank Mark Purdy for that quote. I also thank him for getting this one from Series MVP Pablo Sandoval: “The right time. It came down to the right time.”

    14     I couldn’t have said it better. It has been an astounding ride, and we are proud of the our team. 

    15    You know what else is funny?

    16    I don’t feel like throwing this in anyone’s face. Baseball is the way we pass time on summer days when we hear lawnmowers buzzing and see butterflies alighting in our gardens, and hear our awesome announcers bringing us the games.

    17   It is a part of the daily noise we often ignore while enjoying things. 

    18   Every  now and again our teams win big games, and we go out of our minds. 

    19   But in the middle of summer, we have no idea about being careful about what you wish for. 

    20   By October, you start putting your entire life on hold. 

    21   Your team starts to infiltrate and control your daily life. 

    22   Summer has stepped into October, stepping on the feet of dusty skeletons and holding up the advancement of the ghosts. 

    23   It becomes other worldly. 

    24    And when finally you win it all, it is more of a death than a celebration. 

    25   You’re just relieved that the stuff is over. 

    26   This morning I am too exhausted to post pictures of Giants’ fans in Detroit putting brooms in people’s faces. 

    27   It isn’t about that. 

    28    It’s about that sort of thing in July, but by the time you are in the Series, you just want it all to end. In the end, it was a blink.

    29   This one ended with a bang, not a whimper. And it ended almost before it began.

    30    Romo strikes out the side in the tenth, with a caught looking on Cabrera. That strikeout was just plain stupid, and Cabrera had to know it. You don’t lose the Series on an 89 mph fastball. I loved it. I have to admit. I loved it.

    31   I shot my fists into the night, and loved every second of it. 

    32    I admit I screamed, “GIANTS!!!” Because I could.

    33    A lot of it was a huge relief. 

    34   I went on Facebook and posted something or other. I couldn’t even see the keyboard because I was so tired. 

    35   But World Champions. And deservedly so. 

    36   How do you enjoy that with grace?

    37   A part of me felt sorry for all the baseball fans who followed their own teams all year. I want to share the joy with them, the joy of the game, for love of the game. 

    38   It’s almost like once your team is out of it, the only people who care about the Series are the teams that are in it.

    39   And when your team just whoops the other teams ass, you almost feel guilty about celebrating. 

    40   It’s sort of like, “Let’s have a huge celebration for us!” And the 99% who didn’t get there are not on board. 

    41   I think the true celebration should be for all the baseball fans who love the game. It feels like it should be a shared thing, like ALL the teams should hoist the trophy and pass it around for taking part in the greatest sport of them all.

    42   Just some thoughts. 

    43   I went in to each playoff game with a bit of Zen thrown in. I played Sugar Magnolia before each game. I played my guitar an hour before each opening pitch, concentrating on throwing good vibes and nice thoughts out there. I stayed calm. That’s what our Giants are about. Daily routine. Garbage trucks. Particles.

    44   I wore the same things each night, and yes, I DID launder them.

    45   Same hat.

    46   I showered each night before the game, then put on my hat. It’s a Sinatra hat.

    47   It looks clean, but like it’s been through a season. Same approach, each game of the playoffs.

    48   I got into a zone, and I think most Giants’ fans get what I’m talking about. 

    49   Too much on the line not to think of good vibes and particles. 

    50    If you’re going to San Francisco…

    51   The East Coast doesn’t get that stuff. 

    52   Dude. Our Governor used to be called Moonbeam. 

    53   We have Mays and McCovey.

    54   It is what it is. 

    55   Thanks Giants. You lit up the night, and it is a grand feeling. 

    56   I’ll celebrate with the parade, and the DVD’s. Those aren’t throwing it in other fans’ faces.

    57   Thank you everyone who respects baseball. 

    58   It remains something no other sports’ fans can understand, let alone people not into sports.

    59   Thanks to every fan for a wonderful season. 

    60   Pitchers and catchers report in Februrary. 

    61   I’m happy to say, “That’s close!”

    62   And thanks Boche. 

    63   See you again. It’s great to be alive, and to have lived through all of this. Raise a glass to the greatest sport on Earth. Raise a glass to the San Francisco Giants. They deserve it. So do their fans.

    64   Peace. 

    ~H~
       

    www.xanga.com/bharrington


  • The Daily News
    1  Small ball.

    2   Is it possible that I actually took a snooze during last night’s game?

    3   Quite possible. 

    4   For the second day in a row I had a garbage truck attempting to make me late for work. 

    5   I smiled huge.

    6   I had a feeling that Bumgarner was going to be on, despite his last outing. 

    7   Bochy would not have pitched him if it were any other way. 

    8   I have a sneaking suspicion that Mike Krukow may have done a little coaching. 

    9   I have to think that it would be awkward to pull the young pitcher aside and say that he needs to adjust his approach, but Kruk has been saying that on the air publicly for at least a month. It’s tough, because he isn’t a coach.

    10  Yesterday Kruk said that Bumgarner had essentially taken his radio advise and adjusted his pivot and turn so that his release point was where it needed to be. 

    11  Something worked. The adjustments Bumgarner made were the adjustments that Krukow has suggested on the radio. Whatever. Something worked.

    12   Does it upset me that we are up two games to none in the World Series?

    13   Nope.

    14   Nobody said this would be easy. 

    15   I would much rather be up two games to none, any day. 

    16   We travel to enemy territory now. 

    17   We travel there to break some hearts, hopefully.

    18   This will be the true test. The Giants do well on the road, but that’s because they go to smaller stadiums where their bats come alive. 

    19   They now travel to a cavern that the Tigers know pretty well, and who will have a definite home field advantage. 

    20   I’m thinking that we want to come back with one win, at the least. 

    21  I would love a Series’ sweep, but realistically, that probably won’t happen. 

    22  We can’t really control the particles in Detroit. 

    23  We can hope for chill weather and garbage trucks. Both are likely in Motor City.

    24   Moving On, Part One: When I awoke to write this Chaplin’s The Kid was on the teevee. Silents.

    25   The story is about how the Tramp finds a baby abandoned by an opera singer. 

    26   He doesn’t want to keep the baby and tries to put it in a woman’s stroller, but she catches him. He then tries to ditch it in the street, near a sewer, but gets caught by a cop.

    27   The cop looks like Hunter Pence with a mustache. 

    28    Too much baseball, I swear.
    29    I tried to get a pic of the guy, but I couldn’t find one. If you can imagine Hunter Pence in an old police uniform and sporting a mustache, then you would have the picture. 

    30  I’m actually not sure if the guy looked like Pence, or if I was just hallucinating.

    31   You must admit that an intense Pence looks like an extra in a silent movie. 



    32  Moving on, Part the Second:  Friday light. 

    33  No game, and I’m glad. 

    34  My friend John Arnolfo sells merch at the games and said that everybody who works in that business is wiped out by the post season. 

    35  They’re making GREAT money, but the hours are taxing. He had to take time off on doctor’s orders. 

    36   He told me that some of the guys were actually rooting for the Cardinals to win just so they could go home and get some rest.

    37   Moving on, Part the Thoid: I’m guessing they are rooting for the Giants now.

    38   I get it. I’m wiped out just from working so hard. Being a fan in the post season is a full-time job. It occurred to me at one point that losing and going home wasn’t the worst of all worlds. 

    39   But I loves me the Giants, and a World Series victory would cap an awesome season, and be something we will all remember for a long time. 

    40   I’m just glad I’m not selling souvies. I’d love the money, but would absolutely not love being burnt to the ground by now. 

    41  So a day’s rest. I think I’m going to watch me some Midsummer this afternoon and take a long-needed break from life. 

    42  Enjoy your rest too. 

    43  We might wake up Monday morning World Series’ champions. 

    44   Let’s send those particles to Detroit. 

    45   Nothing would be nicer. 

    46   Peace.
     
    ~H~


                                                                       

    www.xanga.com/bharrington


  • PANDA!!!



       

    The Daily News
    1   I knew we had it yesterday from the git go. 

    2   Yesterday morning I got pulled over by a cop for not having my registration sticker on my license plate.

    3   I bought my car in the summer in the middle of doing a remodel and a vacay, and must have forgotten to put my registration sticker on the car. 

    4   Just forgot. Didn’t occur to me until two days ago when I glanced down at my license plate. So the sticker is somewhere in a house that was remodeled during the summer.

    5   Somebody tried to ruin my day, but it just wasn’t going to happen. 

    6   Two other times I had to avoid cops. One was near Walgreens, and I re-routed, not because I had done anything wrong; I just wanted to avoid being detained for any reason on a key vibe day.

    7   I  then pulled up to a stoplight and saw that a cop was lurking in the bushes waiting to ambush some poor bastid. 

    8   I turned into a parking lot to avoid trouble, but realized I was WAY late in getting back from lunch because of the minimum day. 

    9    I deliberately turned in to a parking right, and detoured through a parking lot, only to find a huge garbage truck in front of me, blocking my access to Quimby Road. 

    10  I was irritated, because I had already come to school late in the morning because of the cop who had pulled me over. 

    11  And now a garbage truck…

    12  A garbage truck…
    13  Did I not hope to see a garbage truck in the other day’s DN?

    14  I believe I did when I talked about Duane Kuiper freezing his ass off in Cincy, and seeing the appearance of garbage as the sign of a dove from above.

    15  I broke into a huge smile, hopped out on Quimby, only to see ANOTHER garbage truck. 

    16   You can’t make this stuff up. I broke into a huge smile.

    17    Moving on, Part One: Two days ago I told David, our director for Midsummer, and his sound girl Ashley that I had sort of inherited a puppy that we named Rocket J. Dog. 

    18   Yesterday, because I was late and on a minimum day, I decided to grab a Twilight Zone to start off my ghost unit. 

    19   I had hoped that I had the Twilight Zone episode called Living Doll, the one that had Telly Savalas at odds with a talking doll named Talky Tina. It’s a classic. 

    20   In the episode, Savalas plays Erich, the step-father of little Christie, the daughter of his wife Annabelle. Annabelle can’t get pregnant with Erich’s baby. At the beginning of the story, Annabelle has just bought Christie a doll that moves and talks. The doll was based on Chatty Cathy, a popular talking doll manufactured by Mattel at the time. 

    21  Erich is worried about how much Annabelle spent on the doll. After alienating both Christie and Annabelle by talking about finances, Erich is left alone with the doll, which suddenly opens its eyes. 

    22   He winds the doll up, and it says, “My name is Talky Tina, and I don’t think I like you.”


    Talky Tina. You might remember her. Mwahahaha!!!

    23   It gets creepier from there, and is now considered a classic. Season Five, Episode Six if you want to get it. I got mine at Barnes and Noble. It holds up quite well as you can imagine. 

    24   Anyway, I researched it and found an interesting tidbit, which plays into all of the amazing coincidences of late. 

    25   The actress whose voice they used as Talky Tina, a gal named June Foray, was also the voice of Chatty Cathy. 

    26   And she was the voice of a lot of female characters in myriad Looney Tunes. 

    27   And she was also the voice of Rocky, the Flying Squirrel. 

    28   Rocket J. Squirrel.

    29    Which inspired the name of the puppy, Rocket J. Dog. 

    30   Particles. 



    31   Moving on, Part Three: So the Giants make mince meat out of the Tigers biggest Tiger. 

    32   Zito drenches Verlander, and even gets a base hit, which scored two runs. 

    33   Pablo goes four-for-four with THREE home runs, putting him up there with Reggie Jackson in 1977, Albert Pujols last year, and Babe Ruth, who accomplished this same feat in 1926 AND in 1928.

    34   Panda is dancing with the big bears. 

    35   And when we were threatened, Bochy brings in the circus act of Tim Lincecum, who came out smokin’. 

    36   Okay, I’ll lay off those jokes. 

    37   Meanwhile, we have another game to play. You take each day one at a time in these instances. 

    38   No Hubris. This game is too unpredictable, as yesterday proved.

    39   But you gotta like getting up this morning. 

    40   I’m going into a little Poe today. We’ll talk of Talky Tina, because it is an awesome piece. 

    41   I’ll tell my students of the coincidences, and they won’t see the larger picture of this entire month of annual coincidences. 

    42   I just hope I see a garbage truck this morning. That was awewsome. I get right where Kuip is coming from.

    43   I kept the vibe going well after the game by blasting Beatles 1, their album of Number One hits. It was raining good vibes well into the night.

    44   I wanna throw some great birthday vibes out to my sister Linda, who deserves another Giants’ victory tonight. 

    45   Let’s get it going early. 

    46   Three more games. That’s a bit of a mountain.

    47   Pray for garbage trucks. 

    48   Go Giants. 

    49   Baseball in ‘Tober.

    50   Unworldly. 

    51   An orange-and-black Twilight Zone. 

    52   Let’s do this.

    53   Peace.

    ~H~



    www.xanga.com/bharrington













  • BRING IT.

    The Daily News
    1   Who’s down?

    2   The Giants in six.

    3    The final score?

    4    94-88.

    5    That’s the win differential between these two teams.

    6    I said it the other day and I’ll say it again: It is the Giants v. Verlander.

    7    The Tigers’ have not hit in the playoffs; their fielding is at best suspect, and their pen useless.

    8    The Giants are home after a perfect record in elimination games. It’s raining.

    9    Their starting pitching seems to be back, especially with the gem Zito pitched that got us here. If Zito faulters, they have a bullpen that is the best in the majors.

    10   The weather and the stadiums favor pitching.

    11   Am I worried?

    12   Of course I’m worried, but I’m just glad to be one of the last two teams standing, AND part of a team that sent the mighty Cardinals home with their tails between their  legs.

    13   So I’m going to put myself out there and say Giants in six, despite all the East Coast propaganda and odds.

    14   We are a better team.

    15   We are in our second World Series in three years.

    16   That was no accident.

    17    This team is primed. This team is coached by Bochy.

    18    This team won 94 games without depending on a designated hitter.

    19    That team won 88 games with designated hitters.

    20    That might not seem like much, but in baseball, a six-game differential is significant.

    21    I’m going with the orange-and-black.

    22    It’s WAY into the ‘Tober and we’re still playing baseball.

    23    Why stop now?

    24    It’s just beginning to become fun. It’s pouring. My backyard is drenched.

    25    Don’t stop believing.

    26    Moving On, Part One: At yesterday’s preview of Midsummer, a parent came in looking for his daughter.

    27    His name?

    28    Mr. Zito.

    29    Particles man.

    30   I’m telling you.

    31    Moving On, Part Two:  Garbage trucks.

    32    Each morning on KNBR’s Murph and Mac morning show, our two morning radio guys put in a call to Either Duane Kuiper or Mike Krukow. During one of the bad morning’s of the Cincinnati series, Kuiper was around three or four blocks from his hotel freezing his ass off, and probably not really in the mood to be talking outside on a cell phone.

    33   At one point, when all hope was lost, a garbage truck drove by making it almost impossible for Kuip to hear.

    34   It became a sort of odd sign of hope for the Giants. Shortly thereafter, garbage trucks in the streets seemed to be a signal that the Giants were well on their way to a World Championship.

    35   Last week it happened again, and again they fought back like heroes.

    36   It is the most inside of all the inside jokes, because their was a feisty madness to a guy freezing after a terrible game, and seeing hope in the streets of the enemy. It was like Kuip was looking for some real symbol of hope, like a dove or something, and this smelly garbage truck drove by, drowning out his ability to even hear his cell.

    37   Ever since then, they have hoped for garbage trucks, cans, barges, etc.

    38    It was almost like they were tired of all that garbage in Cincy, and then in St. Louis.

    39   So let’s all pray that a garbage truck drives by in San Francisco.

    40   I’ll be listening, that’s for sure.

    41   Gottago.

    42   Giants 94, Tigers 88.

    43   That is all I have to say.

    44    We will get by.

    45    We will survive.

    46    Peace and keep the vibes flowing!

    ~H~

    www.xanga.com/bharrington

  • THE GIANTS WIN THE PENNANT!!!

    EASILY!!!
    1   I  awakened last night at around 3 a.m. and this movie was blasting on the teevee.

    2   The movie was The Sea of Grass starring Katharine Hepburn and Spencer Tracy. 

    3   I was totally grogged from the Giants’ seemingly effortless victory over the overrated Cardinals. This morning’s Merc headline: Raining Champions!

    4   The first thing I heard upon awakening were these words, which I think came from Tracy:

    “The St. Louis train leaves in a half an hour.”

    5   You can’t make this stuff up.

    6    Marco Scutaro is the NLCS MVP.

    7    And the St. Louis train left in a half an hour.

    8    And it rained.

    9    And we knew from the start that we were going to the World Series.

    10   I still put on my Steal Your Base Grateful Dead shirt, now clean, my shorts, and I once again blasted me some pre-game Sugar Magnolia.

    11   I then made my pre-game snack, which once again consisted of barbecue potato chips diced with pepper cheese, with a chaser of Crystal Light.

    12   The chi was once again too strong for words.

    13   At school, my San Bruno buddy showed up with a crusty beard he has been growing since we hit the playoffs, a crooked orange and black tie, and a comic book expression that was a perfect cross between the Joker and Archie, immediately after making out with both Betty and Veronica.

    14   The guy had no business being in front of kids.

    15   Classic.

    16   Moving on, Part One: The unreality was absolutely stunning.

    17   I took off at lunch to my favorite pho joint, and stared at my iPhone for around a half hour. I realized that I had ignored around five thousand emails, most of which were companies trying to sell me stuff.

    18  I couldn’t care less. Earlier in the day I had caught up with all my grading, so I was living La Vie En Rose, and even thought of the song in the early part of the morning.

    19  Coincidences have been happening to me like the rain, a little at a time, but consistent and as awesome as this entire October.

    20   The pho joint was teeming with a bajillion customers. At first I thought they were just hungover Giants fans, but San Jose ain’t New York.

    21   These guys just wanted to chill with some fat bowls of hot pho. There was clearly no other agenda.

    22   Pho is this Vietnamese soup that eats you.  It is a fat broth with meat and noodles and all sorts of other flavors that swirl around your head and make you surcease from life’s worries. Viet nepenthe.

    23  So I got away from the school, done with my work and chilled at this pho place checking out all the emails I had missed, and tried to ignore the massive amounts of customers surrounding me.

    24   This happened yesterday.

    25   Right in the midst of this baseball madness and pho dizziness, La Vie En Rose came on in the background of the restaurant, right on cue. La Vie En Rose has a way of doing that. 

    26   It spun me around and made me once again realize the particles, and the unbelievable non-reality of the Giants.

    27   Just another coincidence I imagine.

    28   Sort of like Spencer Tracy saying “The St. Louis train leaves in a half an hour.”

    29   Or “Nice hook” happening at the same time that ears-and-braces girl blurted, “I LOVE Peter Pan!”

    30   Or the Beatles DN last Thursday followed by the Merc News headline “Hard Day’s Night” last Friday. Dude. This stuff is public. I am not making any of it up.

    31   Or Miss Phoebe, and Guy de Maupassant’s Diary of a Madman coming on right after I read a student’s response to a short story by the same guy. 

    32   I loves me some ‘Tober.

    33   Especially when the right team wins the pennant.

    34   And the “a” holes who try to butcher Scutaro go home, and HE wins the NLCS MVP.

    35   For the record, you could have made a case for Barry Zito.

    36   His performance was angelically epic.

    37   And Vogey.

    38   And okay, I must say it.

    39   Hunter Pence. As WEIRD as that guy is with his big old eyes that never blink.

    40   And our broadcasters from KNBR.

    41  Dude.

    42  The other day Duane Kuiper said that he saw Vogey in the hallway and said “Hi.”

    43  Vogey gave him the finger.

    44  Awesome.

    45  Garbage trucks. You have to REALLY be a Giants’ fan to get that one. I’ll letcha know about garbage trucks right before the Series.

    46   The Series. All of it. Surreal.

    47  And now we just have to beat one team.

    48  Verlander.

    49  Because besides that guy, the Tigers are paper tigers.

    50  We get into their pen, we win.

    51   Bottom line.

    52   So baseball fans, this is why we LOVE this sport.

    53   And there’s more.

    54   Oh, a LOT more.

    55   Bring it.

    56   Gottago.

    57    Peace.

    ~H~

    www.xanga.com/bharrington


     



  • Anyone down for a little BASEBALL???
     

    The Daily News
    1  Vogey!

    2  Scutaro!

    3  It was sure fun watching the Cardinals last night. 

    4  Karma is best served cold. 

    5  Do I dare say that?

    6  As one of my ex-students said so eloquently, “Why, SOITENLY!!!”

    7  Hey Cards, you got any more fat-ass tractors that you would like to throw at Scutaro’s legs?

    8   Those beotches need to go home with their tails between their sad-ass legs. 

    9   Giants’ fans, rise up.

    10  Buster called a magnificent game, and Vogey brought the heat. 

    11  Hey America! The Cards can’t hit low fastballs!!! And they play dirty. And they have a bat-breaking pitcher named Rzepezynski. If he says his name backwards, he is hurled back to the fifth dimension.

    12  One more. Just one more. Am I worried?

    13  Why yes. 

    14  I did my ritual last night. Put on Sugar Magz, wore my Steal Your Base Grateful Dead shirt, poured me a tall glass of iced down Crystal Light, and settled in with some barbecue chips laced with pepper cheese.

    15  And then blasted the Kingston Trio during the flyover. That, the crowd, the chips, the icy Crystal, and the Dead made for a great beginning to the game. Particles.

    16  I’d like to thank the Raiders for being the set-up guys, even though I turned them off to make an all-baseball event in my own home. 

    17   One more. 

    18   They tell me this town ain’t got no heart.

    19   But I can hear it beat out loud. 

    20   Go GIANTS!

    21   Moving on, Part One: It helped considerably that my daughter Nicole brought her new puppy over to visit. His name is Rocket J. Dog, but we call him Rocky. 

    22   He’s clearly as feisty and goofy as a pugnacious Irishman, and thinks he can take on Phoebe. 

    23   She could eat him in one bite. 

    23   I didn’t take a pic or I’d share it, and I tried even to steal one off Facebook, but it wouldn’t let me. 

    24  That guy made my day. I was a complete slave to grading papes yesterday and Saturday. No weekend except sitting and grading and watching sports and old movies. 

    25   In all of that, the Rocket appeared. The Universe had lined up, beginning actually last week with that one guy breaking the sound barrier, and then some real outer space stuff hurtling to Earth and breaking the sound barrier. 

    26   And right in the middle of grading papers, I was reading some student’s response to this old short story by Guy de Maupassant, the French writer who wrote the sort of famous short story The Necklace. 

    27   Anyway, I had my students read that story and respond to it in writing. In the middle of reading this student’s response, I got bored and clicked on TCM.

    28   A movie was just starting. 

    29   It was a film called The Diary of a Madman starring Vincent Price. 

    30   “Perfect!” I thought. 

    31   I kept reading the student’s response, looked up, and it said, “Based on a story by…Guy De Maupassant.”

    32   Things are lined up. I gotta tellya. 

    33   On Friday I told you about the Beatles and the headline on Friday “Hard Day’s Night.”

    34   These things are simply coincidences, right?

    35    Moving on, Part the Second: Well, maybe.

    36    Or maybe there just is something out there, some sort of particles that they just don’t have in St. Louis. 

    37    Whatever it is, it is out there and happening, and if you can feel it, so can I.

    38    And I’m going to love it.

    39    And so should you. 

    40    I don’t know about anyone else, but I am definitely down for a little more baseball. 

    41    I’m down for a LOT more baseball. 

    42    Moving on, Part the Thoid: On Friday, our awesome drama director David invited the English department to a preview of A Midsummer Night’s Dream, which will play tomorrow. I’ve been too busy to get down there and enjoy our school’s first Shakespearean play, but I’m taking my classes to the preview. So I’m doing a mini-mini unit on Midsummer, which I suggested to David last year after he had finished Grease. 

    43    I actually suggested not only Midsummer, but a dream year of Midsummer in the Fall and Godspell in the Spring, my two favorite plays ever. 

    44   It’s a bit too into the 4 a.m. right now for me to dig it up, but I know that I mentioned that in a DN last Spring when we did Grease. At the time, I also suggested Godspell for the Spring musical.

    45   Moving on, Part Four: There’s a great movie on right now starring Katharine Hepburn. It is called Quality Street by J.M. Barrie and directed by George Stevens. 
    46   Some of you might remember the coincidence last week of my writing “Nice hook!” on a student’s introductory paragraph of an essay I was grading. 

    47  The second I wrote the “H” on “hook” a freshman girl right in front of me said, “I LOVE Peter Pan!”. All ears, smiles, and braces. It came out of nowhere. 

    48   I had just talked about coincidences and Halloween and the Heidi stories and all. She broke into a huge grin. Goofy. 

    49   Katharine Hepburn plays the part of Phoebe Throssel, and is called “Miss Phoebe” all through the Quality Street. J.M. Barrie wrote Quality Street. J.M. Barrie also wrote Peter Pan. Hook is a film about Peter Pan and Captain Hook. 

    50   Quality Street also has two characters named Blore and Witherspoon, two characters from two of my past plays. Blore was a character in M is for the Million, and Witherspoon a character from Arsenic and Old Lace. I mentioned Phoebe earlier in this DN.

    51   I’m smiling. The coincidences continue. The particles are in place. 

    52    Believe what you will. I just document this stuff. It is all true. 

    53    And I don’t know about you, but I’m down for a little baseball.

    54   Who else is down?

    55   Have a GREAT Monday, and GO GIANTS!!!!
    56    Peace.

    ~H~



    www.xanga.com/bharrington


  • ARE YOU SERIOUS????? 
    WAINWRIGHT? DESCALSO? KOZMA?

    The Daily News
    1    Ouch.

    2    Adam Wainwright.

    3    Did I spell that right? Did that guy even PLAY this season?

    4    I just don’t know what to say. Descalso and Kozma? Who ARE these guys? Are you fricking serious? They don’t even match my background. We can’t be beat by a bunch of bums like these. Can we?

    5    Tough to be a Giants’ fan right now. 

    6   I remember the middle of summer, mowing the lawn and going crazy over comeback victories and a team that showed it knew how to claw and scratch to win games. 

    7   The Giants looked like a dead battery the last two games.

    8   What a way to go.

    9   And Timmeh.

    10  Dude, really?

    11  Never mind the Niners interrupting the chi. 

    12  Did anyone else have to run from room to room to watch those games?

    13  I was trying to cook at the same time, so it was a trifecta. I wanted to make something healthy, because being in a championship series causes lousy eating habits.

    14  I’m not sure, but last time I looked, a bag of Lay’s Barbecue Chips laced with pepper cheese and chased by a gallon of Crystal Light is probably not the best of dinners. A salad each night helped, but dude, really?

    14  I wound up making a huge mess by trying to make a zesty spaghetti sauce with real tomatoes, real garlic, real onions, real rosemary, and all the rest, while jetting in and out of two different rooms to watch the Giants and the Niners.

    15   I wound up with a bunch of noise and a game that was decided after around the fourth pitch. 

    16   What really got me was awakening at 2 a.m. and Googling some St. Louis website that was highly nervous about the Giants. It brought up the entire Reds’ series and said these guys come back and ruin other teams’ seasons. 

    17   Let’s hope so. 

    18   If you is a bettin’ man, your money probably is not on the Giants right now. 

    19   I ain’t a bettin’ man, and I’m glad I ain’t. 

    20   Ya gotta have heart though. You can’t follow your team from February to now and suddenly give up. 

    21   Zito is up today. The guy has stymied a lot of teams this year. He has done WAY better than Timmeh all year, and he has been consistent. 

    22   Maybe he could throw a monkey wrench into the Cards’ celebration. 

    23   Maybe. His record against the Cards is abysmal. His interview in this morning’s Merc has him WAY confident. He’s going after these guys, he says. 

    24   Let’s just hope so. 

    25   Moving on, Part One: Somehow we have a minimum day today. It couldn’t come at a better time. It is our Homecoming. It is the inaugural game for our new football field. I’m probably not going to go because I’m exhausted from the past two weeks.

    26   It is going into the 2 a.m. I have some old movie blasting in the bedroom. 

    27   I loves me some old movies. They keep me grounded. Buncha wiseguys.

    28   Moving on, Part Two: Yesterday I asked my classes if they knew what a run-on sentence was. At least six different kids per class said, “It is when a sentence just keeps going on and on.”

    29   I stood astounded. That answer kept coming up. “It’s when a sentence has way too many conjunctions and just keeps going.”

    30  



    31  This is what happens when the State gets rid of grammar books. There is a new generation of teachers who never learned grammar. 

    32  Scary. 

    33  I said, “Whoever taught you that was wrong. I have the rule book. You can’t go to college writing run-on sentences.”

    34   They looked at me like scared deer. 

    35   I asked, “Do you know the definition of a sentence?”

    36   Dead silence. Nobody did. I wasn’t mad; I was dumbfounded.

    37   “A sentence is a group of words containing a subject and a verb, and that makes a complete thought.”

    38



    39   I wrote on the board, “We went to the store.”

    40   “Is this a sentence?”

    41




    42    I swear to you. 

    43    <sigh>

    44   Doesn’t look good. 

    45   Brightest students in the District. 

    46   I’m discovering some alarming things. 

    47   Our school has over 2,600 students. 

    48   We have one class set of grammar books for the entire school. They are terrible books and emphasize writing that is clearly beyond the basics. The movement years ago to get rid of grammar was one of the most idiotic movements in American education. The rest of the world laughs at our idiocy. One lousy class set is all that remains. 

    49   I’m not kidding. I make copies of Warriner’s grammar books from the eighties. It cost me ten bucks on Amazon. I hope to change the world with it. 

    50   I run off copies upon copies. 

    51   It is my sole weapon against this idiocy. 

    52   Sometimes I feel like I oughta buy myself a huge broom, and try to rid the shores of sand. 
    53   It is REALLY scary. 

    54   It reminds me of this quote by Unamuno: “Against stupidity the very gods themselves contend in vain.”

    55   Vonnegut led me to that quote, which I quaffed in one shot. 

    56   Wow. 

    57   TGIF.

    58   Just thought I’d lay some of that out for you on this beautiful Friday.

    59    Keep your spirits up. 

    60   We still have baseball, and next week is the beginning of Halloween. I get my Halloween on early.

    61   I already had a WAY public coincidence happen. 

    62   Remember two days ago when I wrote all about the Beatles?
    64    Yesterday’s Merc News sports page had this:



    65   Ya gotta believe. 

    66    So let’s win. 

    67   Have a GREAT weekend.

    68   Peace. 

    ~H~



    www.xanga.com/bharrington










  • The Daily News
    1   Giants. Really?

    2   Mr. Pence. If you are going to motivate, you have to perform better than 0 for 4 and a.091 post-season batting average. If  you don’t perform, you come out looking like a macabre circus clown.

    3   I was excited when we got you, but dude. People are going to start calling you “Underpants” if you don’t change your ways. 

    4    I have never seen so many missed opportunities. These guys had everything going their way yesterday. What happened? O for 7 with eleven stranded runners. Your pitcher pitches his best game. Their best hitter goes down with a knee injury. There is even an interrupted rally and a three-hour rain delay to re-group.

    5   Yuck.

    6    Mucky, murky loss. 

    7    Fortunately, this team does have a tendency to bounce back after a loss. But this was a loss that is impossible to figure. 

    8   Nobody stepped up for Matt Cain. 

    9    Story of the guy’s life. 

    10  Argh.

    11  Moving on, Part the First: Ah, vell. 

    12  I still think that we can get there. No doubt. Well, certainly a little doubt.

    13  But yeesh.

    14   I’m pretty sure they lost because I couldn’t find my “Torture” shirt.

    15   Moving on, Part Two: On the other hand, I personally had a GREAT day yesterday. I got myself back to my relaxed, free wheelin’ teaching style, rather than trying to be the stern professor. Kids did the classwork from the previous day on the board. I played Disney music while they wrote. 

    16  I later did a great job presenting some teaching techniques to the faculty at our meeting yesterday.  I do confess that the person before me was a reasonably easy act to follow. She was nervous, gave a nice presentation but kept standing in front of the LCD projector so that her presentation took place on her shirt. The microphone was broken so she also was just short of loud enough. 

    17   She did a great job, but was a bit of a victim of technology.

    18   Whenever I have to speak at a meeting, I never use any technology and with the exception of a microphone, and only if it is working. The mic yesterday was hideous, buzzing and clunking out, clearly available but clearly useless.

    19   I didn’t want any of this to be a missed opportunity. I had planned my five-minute presentation the day before, bulleted my presentation on half-sheets of paper, practiced, stepped up, and delivered. 

    20   I was the third presenter following somebody who sort of tried but was victimized by technology. 

    21   I knew better, stepped up, and honestly gave an excellent presentation. 

    22   The next presenter was the former head of our department, who presented a cross-curricular writing rubric that I had formed for the department three or four years ago. I say “formed” because I took bits and pieces from the CSU rubric and bits and pieces from another, combined them into one rubric, and then simplified it so that it would work for anyone in any sitch, and then delivered it to the English department. 

    23  To be honest, I did it one day during my prep period so as to avoid the department trying to put one together at an after-school meeting. 

    24   What people don’t understand about English departments is a) they are always one of the largest departments at any school, since students must take four years of English in order to graduate, b) English teachers majored in pondering, and c) given any meeting,  nineteen English teachers will have nineteen different points of view. Most meetings take about two hours, usually resulting in this comment: “Well. I guess we’re right back to where we started.” How many English teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb? “Does it have to be a lightbulb?”

    25  I decided to write that rubric so that they had something that they could operate on. The lion’s share of the work was done in around an hour and a half by me. 

    26   I wasn’t trying to be a hero; I just wanted to avoid a long, tedious afternoon of pondering.

    27   It worked. It was a classic re-direct. I brought copies for everyone, and they all said, “Shiny!”

    28   That meeting had started with, “So our mission today is…” and I simply interrupted with, “If I may…” and then I handed out copies of my rubric to everyone. I did what never would have happened at that meeting. 

    29   That meeting three or four years ago still took a couple of hours, but they all had something to feast upon.

    30    So at yesterday’s meeting, right after my own successful presentation, she stood up, put the rubric on the projector, and gave me public acknowledgement. 

    31   Moving on, Part the Thoid:  Yesterday a younger teacher emailed our department that she had gotten in over her head by attempting to read Frankenstein to her students. Great idea, but as a veteran teacher, I know that reading a book to students isn’t necessarily a good idea. Reading excerpts and telling the story in an engaging fashion does work, but it takes ruthless planning. I wrote her back with this story:

    32   A few years ago I wanted to be the best teacher in the school. Our lit books have nine books of Homer’s Odyssey in them. The real Odyssey is something like twenty-five books. Because I wanted to offer my students things better than the competition I decided I was going to give my students the real deal, and teach all twenty-five books. 

    33


    34   Can you say, “Hubris?” I clearly had bitten off way more than I could chew. I wound up doing this: I went to Spark notes online, which summarizes each chapter, bulleted every couple of sentences in each book, and practiced telling them each night. I went into class and delivered a few chapters a day, in short bursts. I interspersed the nine chapters from our book and had the students read them so they would get a feel for the sweeping poetry and lilting majesty of the piece. 

    35  And then I would show the film, which does a grand job with the story, and which basically uses the nine chapters that are “mainstream.” My students got the entire story, and even the sequel, which the movie doesn’t have. 
    36   It almost killed me, but it worked nicely. My email to the young teacher was shorter, but she wrote this awesome email thanking me. That was ALL yesterday.

    37    What a Good Day is to a Teacher, Part Four: Honestly, I’m not trying to brag here. It’s just some days in this profession are good, and some are awesome. Yesterday was one of those days that wound up being awesome, even though I didn’t notice it while it was happening. There’s more.

    38   Two days ago a Special Ed teacher came into my room completely distraught. Special Ed teachers have to do Individual Education Plans (IEP’s) for their students. 

    39   Let me preface this by saying that Special Ed teachers are gods. No other teachers come close to working as hard as they do, not even this Old Brown Shoe, who never stops working hard. The IEP’s require meetings with social workers, counselors, admin, and one mainstream teacher. 

    40   Mainstream teachers get no supervision hours for this, nor do they get paid. They are asked to give up their prep periods to come down to what often is a rewarding experience. They get to know why Johnny behaves as he does, and they get to know Johnny’s parents. 

    41   To me they are a rewarding means of volunteering, but what happens when you are a good-hearted teacher is you become the “go-to” guy. Most people won’t work for free, or give up a break just to add another hour to an already overloaded work sched. 

    42   So she came into my room the other day, and was at wit’s end. I knew she was going to ask me to sit in on a meeting, and I smiled and said, “Relax. I got your back.”

    43   As I left the faculty meeting yesterday, I saw her talking to another teacher, worry etched all over her face. She came up and said, “Don’t forget about the IEP tomorrow?” I smiled and said, “When you said it was ‘high profile’ I knew you were in pretty deep. I’ll be there dude.” She looked at me totally relieved. High profile means lawyers, social workers, possible angry parents, and possible shouting. I wasn’t looking forward to it, and I’m still not, but I will do things like that. 

    44   After all that hooplah, I  hopped into the Ol’ Timuh, turned on the Giants’ game, and thought about what an awesome day yesterday was. 

    45   And I will repeat, this is not intended to pat myself on the back, but to give a glimpse of what it is like to be a teacher in 2012.  It is never easy, but I’m seeing my job more and more as a chance to help younger teachers cope with all the stuff I had to cope with over the years. 

    46   It was a good day. 

    47   And it is nice that I don’t have to live my life vicariously depending on guys like Hunter Pence to come through. 

    48   He might.

    49   The Giants might bounce back. I’ll be so bold as to say I think they will. 

    50   Meanwhile, I had a tremendous day at the plate. I don’t always. Consider this just another glimpse inside the profession.

    51   See you again. 

    52   Peace.

    ~H~



     
     



  •          The Daily News

    1   I graded papers and threw on some Beatles yesterday.

    2    It just seemed like a Beatles’ type of day, the morning mist causing me to be wet beneath the blue suburban skies and all, and the same morning having sun, sun, sun here it comes, blazing into my kaleidoscope eyes.

    3    It was a great morning that turned not great at the end of the day.I think all of my stresses came at me when I had to put my last class in check. They started to get out of control: one kid kept walking in front of me and sharpening his pencil during a lecture; another popped up twice to walk right in front of me and throw out paper; several in the back kept talking. 

    4

    5   Anyone who has ever had me knows that I can be the nicest guy around, but that if you push me a bit too far, I can be a rattlesnake. 

    6   I never like when that part of me comes out, but these guys tried to push. 

    7    Dude. 

    8    You go to Evergreen. 

    9    I come from YB. 

    10  You’re messing with a rifleman. 

    11   Who does constant mixed metaphors. That means something ain’t right. 

    12   Fortunately I have mellowed a whole bunch, perhaps because of Camp Anytown. 

    13   I know, I know, but those were some excellent lessons. I had no idea that I used to scare the bijayzuss out of students when I would go on one of my tirades. Never occurred to me because I knew that I would never hurt a fly, but they didn’t. 

    14   And it definitely would get the message out not to mess with me. Every once in a while hurling a stool into the seats would get attention. And I would blow. I own that. I was a madman when I was a younger teacher. I see younger teachers exhibiting the same behaviors and pretty much shake my head. I have definitely gotten mellower. 

    15   But yesterday I felt like I was at a kiddie matinee, where kids would throw popcorn and holler and scream. 

    16   The circus was in town, and going on right before my eyes. 

    17   Granted, it was freshmen at the end of the day, but they were trying to test me. They wanted to see how far they could push me.

    18   Never a wise thing. I have much finer means of intimidation than I ever had acting like a lunatic. They kept getting out of their seats, snapping each other’s ears, and generally pushing behaviors that earlier had just been mild. They were over the top, and it was time. 

                                                                              

    19   I stopped mid-sentence and gave a look. My eyes darted around the room, instilling certain doom to every one of the little bastids. 

    20   I maintained an agonizing silence. 

    21   These guys turned black and white, and then cold. 
     
                                                                   a a a cylops 3

    22   I spoke softly, saying, “Normally when this sort of stuff happens, I leave the room. You don’t ever want me to leave the room.”

    23   Then I got quiet again, and singled out specific behaviours, and how they were rude. 

    24   I said, “You were not only rude. You were rude as hell.”

    25   Extreme fear. Satan walked into the room and frightened them. 

    26   He said the “H” word. 

    27   Damned right. 

    28   Quick sidebar: I just got spell-checked on “behaviours.”

    29   I was trying to be British, since this began with a British invasion. 

    30   AnywayZ…

    31   The last fifteen minutes of class had them working on a couple of grammar exercises. 

    32   It was eerily silent. Not a peep out of them. 

    33   I felt empowered. I remained poker-faced, grading papers and ignoring the horrid silence. 

    34   Sometimes you have to. 

    35   Any break in character would become a crack in the dam. 

    36   The mixed metaphors began haunting me. 

    37   The guilt then took over. 
    38   I wanted to smile again. 

    39   I wanted everything to be sweet. 

    40   But the behaviours said I couldn’t crack. 

    41   Everything that has happened to me in the past three years swirled around, and I thought of good things. 

    42   I thought of everyone I love.

    43   People and things that went before. 

    44   I thought of In My LIfe, one of the most beautiful songs ever written. 

    45   When the bell rang, the students gathered together in bunches, hunched and guilty. Some of my biggest fans looked down, realizing that I’m not always the nicest guy in the world. They seemed disappointed, but understanding. 

    46   I knew that staying angry and not giving in to emotion would ultimately give me more respect, but it was not easy. 

    47   They piled by the door for the last ten seconds of the day, and moved out like cattle. 

    48   A few of them whispered, “Sorry Mr. H,” and shuffled out the door. 

    49   I remained stoic. 

    50   The room emptied. 

    51   I opened the curtains, turned off the lights, and stared out the window.

    52   The sadness of the last three years hit me. 

    53   All I thought about was In My Life. 

    54   I didn’t have my guitar, and it killed me. 

    55    If you play music and sing, sometimes you want to burst. I wanted a guitar so badly. It’s a Sherlock Holmes sort of thing. 

    56   I managed to work my way over to my computer, which I have hooked to some good Altec speakers, and found a karaoke version of In My Life. It worked beautifully, especially the interlude right in the middle of the song. 

    57   It was what was needed. Though I know I’ll never lose affection…

    58   I settled in, reflecting a bit about the last class, but soon figured this was just a little hitch in a career of giddy ups. I graded papers, and cheered up to the music of arguably the greatest rock band in history.

    59   And then I closed up shop for the day. 

    60    All these places have their moments. 

    61    I  love you all, everything.

    62    Peace.

                                                                     ~H~


                                                  www.xanga.com/bharrington