February 1, 2012
-
1 I’ve been teaching tons of grammar these days. Not exactly a riveting thesis for today’s DN, mind you, but certainly the first thing I thought of this morning.
2 In the past few years, I have had tons of fun teaching literature, and having coffee houses, magazines, skits, and other fun things going on in my classroom.
3 This year, having sophomores and seniors, grammar needed to replace a lot of things. For the sophs, the California High School Exit Exam appears next week. That’s the bubble test they need to take in order to graduate. The seniors severely need a refresher course before college.
4 So I armed them thoroughly. Our school has virtually no grammar books, because back in the eighties a movement to get rid of grammar was set in place.
5 At the time, I kidnapped some of the old Warriner’s grammar books and saved them from the metaphorical book burning. Other teachers laughed at me because the idea was that immersion in books will automatically teach the students grammar. <basketball buzzer>
6 I recently bought an older copy of Warriners from Amazon for ten bucks. It was the best purchase I have ever made.
7 The students and the teachers are all held accountable for massive grammar instruction. The CAHSEE has large amounts of grammar questions. Our pacing guide insists that we teach mountains of grammar. The standards demand it. On the other hand…
8 The school has terrible grammar resources. The books we have teach one concept and give about three or four mini-exercises in order for the students to master complex concepts.
9 I have shot WAY past nouns and pronouns and all of that to some highly complex writing for the students.
10 They don’t all like it, but I have been brainwashing them with correctness. I tell them that I write virtually every single day of the school year, with the exception of weekends and holidays, and that I STILL find huge grammatical errors after I have edited three, four, five times. It often gets published publicly.
11 That is partially the fuel that runs the DN. And readers of this nonsense know that I have often made errors with the three “theres”. I know the rules, for gawdsakes, yet I find glaring errors almost every day.
12 Granted, I write this in the middle of the night with one eye open and the other closed. My spelling will be ridiculous sometimes. I have spelled “the” “teh” more times than you may ever know.
13 While writing the DN, I’ll often experiment with concepts I am teaching.
14 I write my own vocalary lists from SAT books. I even use the International Phonetic Alphabet to help the students with pronunciation.
15 It’s a swell list each week, and it includes upside-down “e”s and vowels with party hats.
16 For the record, the upside-down “e” is called the “schwa” sound.
17 It is the wound of the “u” in butter and the “o” in other. I ask my students if they know what sound the schwa makes.
18 It looks as though Mayweather knocked an “e” on its keester.
19 It looks like this: ə. The thing got hit so hard that it highlighted the rest of this DN. I can’t undo. That’s some punch.
20 What I like about teaching grammar is that I can copy chapters from Warriner’s and make small handouts. It takes around four seconds to get a week’s lesson plans done. I don’t want to rely on that, because I’m much more into letting students interact and do projects, magazines, masks, skits, poems, and all the rest.
21 Grammar is actually easier, because I don’t have to be quite as involved as when I bring my lessons more alive. I still have them interact in groups, and I seldom put my own answers to things out there. Every chance I have I allow them to teach one another. We come together in larger sessions and trade work. I do the homework I assign instead of relying on a teacher’s manual.
22 Quite often, a sharp student will come up with a better answer than I.
23 I intersperse all of this with music. When they are in groups, I quietly play every sort of music you can imagine as a nice background.
24 I’ll circulate and listen to them change sentences that are incorrect, and they will ask me all sorts of grammatical questions. They are starved, believe it or not.
25 I have brainwashed them into conciseness.
26 Moving on, Part the First: Grammar isn’t always a hot topic for most people. I’m pretty sure the only reason I brought this up was that last night I awakened at around 2 a.m. and thought, “Oh, that’s right. The DN is already written!”and then I drifted back off until four.
27 I woke up to, “OMG! The GRAMMAR lessons are automatically done! You mistook that for the DN, you moron!”
28 It’s sort of like being late for work or class. You know how you sort of shower cold, jump into your pants, and button your shirt so that the left side is around a foot longer than the right?
29 And the first words out of your mouth are “Oh, @#$%!
30 Ah, yes. The coffee in the car, inevitably spilling on your shirt or blouse. The looking in the car mirror to see if you aren’t hideous.
31 Yeah.
32 It was somewhat like that, except that it’s around 5:30 now and I don’t really need to be anywhere until eight.
33 So no harm done. The coffee is perking. The radio is on. The dog has gone out. All good gifts.
34 We have a short day today anyway. We are going to talk about “The Black Binders” today, at least I think we are. The Black Binders are these two or three inch binders they gave us last week or the week before. They are to prepare us for a visit next year by the Western Association of Schools and Colleges.Very big deal. They accredit schools. They are big guns. I always tell my students that we are going to be visited this year by the WPC. Someone will always ask, “What’s the WPC, Mr. H?” My answer: “White people with clipboards.”
35 I sort of like them, because they make schools better. It’s just a pretty intimidating thing. All professional organizations need accountability, or we would have a bunch of hee-haws spending taxpayers’ dollars.
36 So the Black Binders are thick and frightening. To many teachers, they spell hours of extra work, and they aren’t happy.
37 My own experience this year in particular has been I have worked ridiculously long hours, giving up much of my time to the school. I’m not complaining, because I enjoy going in completely prepared for each week. I liken it to NFL players going into each game ready for war.
38 The Black Binders look like hours and hours of extra work. I saw that as soon as they broke them open. We were told, “You WILL do this. You WILL make action plans. You WILL put goals. You WILL implement!”
39 I understand what our Admin is up against. It just came off as a tad aggressive, and people don’t like sudden shifts in their daily routine.
40 I sense a backlash against the Black Binders. I personally think there are easier means of getting accredited, but that’s just an opinion. As a professional, I’ll try to do whatever they ask.
41 That’s what I walk into later today. The clouds are gathering. Disgruntled teachers might cause a scene today.
42 No news.
43 I had plenty of news yesterday. Lots of things, and prayers to my daughters, who lost one of their favorite dance teachers yesterday. Prayers to our union president, John Blair, who announced he has cancer, and will be leaving after this grading period. Prayers to my Daddy, whose kidneys are finally gone. Prayers to all of you out there going through a lot of the same stuff.
44 To me, you are news. And it is not always up to me to print your personal things.
45 Just know that I read everything, and I send all my lovin’ out to everyone going through this sort of stuff.
46 It puts things like Black Binders into perspective.
47 And to the Adage gang, I send all my love to Miss Kathy, to her family and friends, and to all of you. She was and is fantastic.
48 Have a reflective day.
49 Gottago.
50 Peace.
~H~
This is dedicated to Miss Kathy, her family and friends, and to all of the beautiful Adage girls. Read the lyrics and think of Miss Kathy’s smile.
For Good
(Elphaba) I’m limited
Just look at me – I’m limited
And just look at you
You can do all I couldn’t do, Glinda
So now it’s up to you
For both of us – now it’s up to you…
(Glinda) I’ve heard it said
That people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led
To those who help us most to growIf we let them
And we help them in return
Well, I don’t know if I believe that’s true
But I know I’m who I am today
Because I knew you
Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood
Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better?
But because I knew you
I have been changed for good
(Elphaba) It well may be
That we will never meet again
In this lifetime
So let me say before we part
So much of me
Is made of what I learned from you
You’ll be with me
Like a handprint on my heart
And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have re-written mine
By being my friend…
Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a skybird
In a distant wood
Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better?
But because I knew you
(Glinda) Because I knew you
(Both) I have been changed for good
(Elphaba) And just to clear the air
I ask forgiveness
For the thing I’ve done you blame me for
(Glinda) But then, I guess we know
There’s blame to share
(Both) And none of it seems to matter anymore
(Glinda) Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood (Elphaba) Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a bird in the wood
(Both) Who can say if I’ve been
Changed for the better?
I do believe I have been
Changed for the better
(Glinda) And because I knew you…
(Elphaba) Because I knew you…
(Both) Because I knew you…
I have been changed for good.
(Elphaba) I’m limited
Just look at me – I’m limited
And just look at you
You can do all I couldn’t do, Glinda
So now it’s up to you
For both of us – now it’s up to you…
(Glinda) I’ve heard it said
That people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led
To those who help us most to grow
If we let them
And we help them in return
Well, I don’t know if I believe that’s true
But I know I’m who I am today
Because I knew you
Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood
Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better?
But because I knew you
I have been changed for good
(Elphaba) It well may be
That we will never meet again
In this lifetime
So let me say before we part
So much of me
Is made of what I learned from you
You’ll be with me
Like a handprint on my heart
And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have re-written mine
By being my friend…
Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a skybird
In a distant wood
Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better?
But because I knew you
(Glinda) Because I knew you
(Both) I have been changed for good
(Elphaba) And just to clear the air
I ask forgiveness
For the thing I’ve done you blame me for
(Glinda) But then, I guess we know
There’s blame to share
(Both) And none of it seems to matter anymore
(Glinda) Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood
(Elphaba) Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a bird in the wood
(Both) Who can say if I’ve been
Changed for the better?
I do believe I have been
Changed for the better
(Glinda) And because I knew you…
(Elphaba) Because I knew you…
(Both) Because I knew you…
I have been changed for good.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CQJaZO2nfGg
To Miss Kathy
