April 15, 2011
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SHARKS!!!
The Daily News
1 Ya gotta love the San Jose Sharks.
2 I almost went into a coma last night, and then they WON! Curse missed opportunities, but they WON! They Beat LA!!!
3 GREAT game, and I’d be surprised if my neighbors didn’t call the police. I whooped it up, because if you watched, you just couldn’t help it.
4 Hockey is nerve-wracking, man.
5 It’s just fun having our own professional sports team.
6 Don’t get me wrong. I’m still a huge fan of my Giants, who were my team from birth.
7 But there’s just something about knowing you could almost walk downtown in Sanjo and be right in the thick of things.
8 And things keep getting thicker.
9 That game was off the hook. Sorry LA fans, but you came into our town, and you got spanked.
10 Fun stuff, and more to come.
11 Maybe much more.
12 Stay tuned.
13 Moving on, Part One: I’ve taken to doing some heavy drinking lately. The trouble is, I can’t decide which drink to have. Chocolate milk? Or ice cold orange juice?
14 Not a bad thing, really, unless it is 3 a.m. and your cat, whose voice has suddenly become that of a Boeing 757, starts his nightly LOUD rant.
15 Last night I stayed up a bit late enjoying the post Sharks game, so on little sleep, I found myself bleary-eyed, and shouting at my cat Todd, “I’m going to be famous tomorrow if you don’t shut up!”
16 Yeesh.
17 Pets.
18 I tellya.
19 Meanwhile, my other cat Cory has suddenly decided that I am his best friend in the world. I have no idea why, because I just abide pets. For whatever reason, they all love me, like I’m Circe or something.
20 Okay maybe not. But they KNOW they annoy me constantly, but they flock to me anyway. I guess I’m pretty lucky, but Cory has taken to hopping up on my chest every five minutes and purring all the time.
21 Which sounds great when you read about it.
22 But sometimes when Todd is in his quiet mode, which is about five minutes in a twenty-four hour period, Cory will shift. So after Todd goes off mee-OWING, I’ll drift back to sleep, only to find Cory has shifted in his sleep so that his ass is fluffed right in my face at around 3:30 a.m.
23 My natural instinct is to hurl him across the room, but I never do. He’s too old, and actually a good old fellow. But he does tend to torture me in quiet ways, like walking directly across my path when I walk down the hall, or standing right in doorways so he gets stepped on continually.
24 But the 3:30 surprise is only one in a series of continual pet things that enjoy waking me in the middle of my dreams.
25 Nothing like a cat’s ass to bring you back to reality.
26 Moving on, Part the Second: You gotta love naive freshmen. The other day one of my students asked me, “Does beer have alcohol in it?”
27
28 I told him I didn’t know, because the only beer I drink is root beer.
29 Surprisingly, he bought it.
30 All I could think of was that guy’s first Spring Break.
31 I swear to you.
32 He’s one of my smartest students too.
33 Well, except for that.
34 Thank God that college is right around the corner, waiting to turn him into an idiot.
34 Moving on, Part the Second: Ah, the halcyon days of youth.
35 Glad they’re over.
36 I swear to you.
37 Moving on, Part the Thoid: Yesterday some ASB kid came into my room with a small box to help the victims of the Japanese earthquake.
38 I constantly give to every charity that comes down the pike, and try to get info out to the students. The recent earthquakes in Japan and Mexico needed me to get instant info to the students, many of whom have family or relatives in those areas.
39 It was good to see that damage was not as intense as the first big Japanese quake, but still.
40 The trouble was, I took the box and started to tell the students to give anything they had, but forgot which cause the box was for! I had to read the box swiftly, and then I passed it around.
41 I guess that’s a good thing. I give to causes all the time, so I hope I didn’t appear insensitive when I had to glance down to see which cause the box was for.
42 I told my students that if we reach a hundred dollars, that I would sing a song for them. And that if we reached five-hundred dollars, I’d stop singing.
43 I also offered out glass insurance.
44 The last time I offered that, I wound up learning six Sinatra tunes.
45 I’ve taken to karaoke when it comes to these things. Playing guitar live in front of my students makes me really nervous. I think it’s because I’m getting older, yet I’m still about a C- as a guitar minstrel.
46 There are kids at my school who have played guitar for six months and could blow me out of the water anyway. So I just play guitar at home now. I still love it, of course, but I don’t know about playing publicly anymore.
47 AnywayZ
48 Both cats have gone off somewhere, so this is probably a good time to wrap this stuff up. It’s now about 5 a.m. and I could use another hour of sleep.
49 Hopefully no more interruptions. Last night I dreamed I was at a Giants’ game eating a hot dog. I relished that dream.
50 I better duck out while the duckin’s good.
51 Peace.
~H~
