November 2, 2009
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The Daily News
1 Mondays are underrated.
2 The idea of Mondays is to fly low. NOBODY wants to be doing what they have to do on Mondays, so it's perhaps our most unchallenged of weekdays.
3 I'll go to my grave declaring Mondays as things not to be intimidating.
4 It's Tuesdays that hurt. We go in on Mondays armed and ready that they are Mondays, and will be days to try to fly through, and we usually manage to fly low and get home safely.
5 Tuesdays, on the other hand, are fanged, drooling, and dangerous, rattlesnakes in the weeds lying low, ready to strike.
6 I find that we are dangerously unarmed and unready for Tuesdays, and have lobbied for years to have Tuesday eliminated as a Day of the Week.
7 Think about it. If Tuesdays were wiped off the map of the world, we would go straight from Mondays to Wednesdays, perhaps our most productive days. By Wednesday, we start to realize the upcoming weekend. We're a bit more lubed and ready to roll on Wednesdays.
8 Wednesday even has a handle: "Hump Day", meaning of course that we are getting over the hump in the middle of the week.
9 I'll take the high road on that one, just to show a modicum of character.
10 Thursdays develop naturally, since they are the day before the official beginning of the weekend.
11 Well I don't know about any of you, but when I was in college, Thursdays were the unofficial beginning of the weekend. Thursday nights were always goof nights since Friday classes were just things we either walked through, or which we had to dread due to some horrendous exam for which we had already studied all week, well, at least a scholar of my degree certainly did.
12 You believe that and I have a bridge to sell you.
13 Anyway, the elimination of Tuesday would do much to improve our work/school/life week. Oh, there are those who were BORN on a Tuesday who would think that the elimination of Tuesdays would make them no longer "full of grace", but really, that's nonsense, since Tuesdays existed when they were born; therefore, they shall ALWAYS remain full of grace.
14 Anyway, those are my thoughts on how to improve the week. Personally I think it makes utmost sense. I also think we should take noon to 2:30 and declare it our lunch hour, like most of the rest of the world. I think we would get much more productivity from people if we treated them as human beings instead of as some sort of cog that controls the bottom line. I have a stretch each day from 11:30-1 and it works wonders.
15 Maybe we could write our elected officials and start a Let's-Stop-Being-So-Stupid Movement, dedicated to the proposition that work/school/life should not be spent worrying and fretting about things unrelated to our personal lives.
16 I spent all day yesterday with my Dad, and decided that everything else in life could be put on hold. I got home and never felt more refreshed and ready to live.
17 Somehow the rest of the world seems to get it, but in America, we have decided that everybody should dread work and look consistently at the clock for the day to end, and for the weekend to arrive, our lives constantly at the mercy of the hands of time.
18 A couple of simple switches would probably make work much more tolerable and would most certainly increase productivity. We've become brainwashed that our lives should sell our souls to the company store.
19 Ah...nope.
20 Moving on: Every now and again I'll throw Tuesday over my shoulder, just because it's an interesting concept. Take none of it seriously, because you should never take a thing I have to say seriously.
21 Moving on, Part the Second: Like the moon last night? Microscopic Moon. Bright. Cool.
22 Moving on, Part the Third: Daylight Saving Time didn't fool me or my clocks when it occurred. It did when I got home from my Dad's. I thought it was seven o' clock, but it was indeed six o' clock. It sort of evened things out because I had originally awakened at what I thought was 4 a.m. but was actually 5 a.m. because the clocks had already changed. It's always an adjustment, another thing I'll never really understand, but I guess it's just one of those life's pitches that hurls itself at us before we even have the bat off our shoulders.
23 DST is one of THE most useless things ever invented, but which we accept, sorta like Tuesdays, and the mumps.
24 AnywayZ, that's about all for a Monday. I promise you there will be a Tuesday DN, despite my idiotic sentiments. Great ideas, but we won't see any of them happen in our lifetime.
25 Meanwhile, fly low, and take care of you. Everything else can wait. Sneak Monday past everybody. You always have Tuesday to get annoyed and frazzled. Live life today. And love life today.
26 Peace.
~H~
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