May 6, 2009
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The Daily News
1 So…Dom DeLuise walks into a bar…
2 Cool guy.
3 Got too old.
4 Gone.
5 Never quite made it past the Seventh Age of Man, which is second-childhood, followed by the inevitable.
6 Funny guy, and well respected.
7 So it goes.
8 Moving on: So everything seems to go.
9 Anybody think you got the Swine Flu?
10 TOO LATE!
11 Sorry about that fat piece.
12 When does all this nonsense cease?
13 Honestly.
14 Analyze things.
15 When you were growing up, did YOU think that life had to be as complicated as it suddenly has become?
16 I mean, I knew that hard work, discipline, focus, and all the rest were obviously good survival tools, but how do you explain every person I know who is still walking around being absolutely overwhelmed by EVERYTHING?
17 I’m tellin’ ya, it hasn’t always been this insane.
18 So consequently I spend a lot of my time blowing everthing off that I could possibly blow off, with the exception of health, which I still blow off, but which I also have a natural propensity for taking somewhat more seriously than all the other boushit that keeps flying at us right and left on a daily basis.
19 I guess that’s the way of the world, but yeesh.
20 If you are stressing others out, then stop.
21 If you are being stressed out by someone else, tell them.
22 If you are in charge, then take it out on someone else. That was and remains your choice, dawg.
23 I’m about to go into the sixth Age of Man. I won’t be returning. I completely look forward to second childhood, mirth, and being ridiculously immature in my old age. Once that’s all done, I intend to act mercilessly immature until I die laughing, sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything.
24 Screw ‘em.
25 So line up, but don’t expect anything remotely serious coming out of me as I roll through all of this.
26 We expend way too much of ourselves over boushit.
27 Our life is frittered away with detail.
28 Snap it on the nose, or slap a towel at its ass, and then cover your mouth in uncontrollable immaturity.
29 You’ve earned it.
30 Live a little. Everything and everyone in your life is trying to prevent that from happening.
31 Screw ‘em.
32 Live life.
33 Love life.
34 Peace.
~H~