January 22, 2009
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The Daily News
1 Hey I made it through my "all-nighter" yesterday pretty famously.
2 The difference between being a student who does an "all-nighter" and a teacher who does is one of peers.
3 College students in particular see it as almost a Rite of Passage. You have to do a certain number of these things to show that you have the fortitude to conquer anything.
4 Teachers look at teachers who do "all-nighters" as guys who procrastinated and are getting exactly what they deserve.
5 The thing is, I actually had NOT procrastinated for the first time in my entire life. I just had tons to do for three-weeks running, and I had planned much of it so I could pace myself.
6 I just fell short by around twelve hours.
7 Anyway I survived and even made it yesterday all the way to 9 p.m. from 6 a.m. the day before!
8 Of course, I still need to get through today, because I woke up at 3 a.m., wrote TWO DN's, and this is my third.
9 The first one sucked. I talked about this group of students who decided to play poker while I was trying to introduce Shakespeare.
10 The height of that DN was that I didn't throw a desk through the cathedral windows when they pulled the cards out the second time.
11 The thing is, they sat right next to my podium.
12 Ah, freshmen. The Ears-and-Braces circuit.
13 Fortunately I'm not the knucklehead I used to be, or someone might have been ducking from a flying dictionary.
14 I just calmly took the cards away, slipped them into my pocket, and kicked the table over. "Um...now that I have your attention, will you kindly open your books to the greatest love story in history, Romeo and Juliet?"
15 Nah, just kidding.
16 Some of you what knows me believed that without blinking.
17 I like it like that.
18 I've mellowed, honestly.
19 Anyway, just thought I'd check in and letcha know that I'm still alive, making it through this past week of utter madness, and am still able to land the DN on your doorstep, as annoying as that can be.
20 Moving on: I must say that the tale end of an "all-nighter" led me to Save Mart last night, where this HUGE lady jumped in front of me in the express line. She had WAY more than 15 items, but I smiled along.
21 I kept glancing down at her items, which I love doing. Not one healthy thing, I swear. I then found myself counting the beeps as the indifferent clerk slid each item across the item-counter laser thingy.
22 I had NO idea why I was counting. I guess because I love goofing on imbeciles.
23 She had 26 items, for the record.
24 Imbecile.
25 Then she wanted to put sixteen dollars on her card and pay the rest with cash.
26 I rolled my eyes, as though it was the most irritating thing of the last hundred years.
27 Then it occurred to me that nobody was in line when she got there, and she probably just wanted to go home. Times are tough, so using as little of your bank account as possible is a sign of the times.
28 I smiled, knowing that we're all just trying to get by.
29 Maybe things are changing.
30 Who knows?
31 So this DN is merely me checking in and letting you know that I'm still able to get things done and keep the good ol' DN rollin' along.
32 I'd better get some sleep. I just realized that I need to wake up early, like in about two hours, so I can plan for the day.
33 So I'm gonna do that.
34 You guys have a great day. Hope it rains and rains.
35 Peace.
~H~
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