Month: October 2008

  • hallow 4 bats, cats and cathedrals hallow 3 nightmare before

    hallow 1 happy halloween!

    The Daily News

    1  HAPPY HALLOWEEEEEEEEEEEEN!!!!!

    2  Ah, is there anything more grand!

    3  Banshees, bumsteads and roses.

    4  Branches, the final autumn leaves, and quite possibly a caldron of bubbling soup permeating the house with the simmering smells of the harvest.

    The Heidi Chronz ran amuck this year.

    6   HUGE hit.

    7  You know, when you’ve delivered the same schtick each year, it’s bound to become sensational by years of hit-and-miss.

    8  What made it all SO much better this year was the existence of block schedules, allowing an extra forty-five minutes of time.

    9  This allowed time for the students to share some wonderful stories, as well as allowing me an opportunity to give them a goodly background of strange occurrences that have happened over the years in our very own Bay Area.

    10  Anyway, it worked better than ever.

    11  So MUCH going on.

    12  Anyway, it’s our Homecoming today.

    13  I’m exhausted,but it’s time to step it up and take all of this to the next level.

    14  I have to get to bed early and awaken early so I can do what I can to assist with a rally, a homecoming, and JUDGE all of it as well, so I do need my sleep.

    15  Anyway, have yourselves a HAPPY HALLOWEEN everbody.

    16  I’m happy to report that nothing terribly strange occurred in the midst of telling the stories this year.

    17  I was able to secure the theater and even had a photographer from the yearbook recording the stories.

    18  I did tell her it was okay to record the entire story on video, but I don’t think that happened.

    19  There were small parts that were left out, but the story has gotten so long at this point that sometimes I sacrifice certain areas so as to keep it moving along.

    20  My goal for updating it by midnight tonight probably won’t be met. I went to the Sharks’ game last night, thoroughly enjoyed myself but by the time I got home I was pretty tired.

    21  I conked out and re-awakened at around 3 a.m. and finished up the DN.

    22  I promised to help with the Homecoming rally and game set-up today and tonight, and I’m also a Homecoming judge. I’m guessing they’ll make me the head judge later today but I don’t know as of this writing.

    23  I don’t mind, really. It’s extra work and all, but the students work pretty hard for this each year, and it’s difficult finding volunteers who don’t mind helping.

    24  Ah, you know how it is.  As a teacher, you sometimes just wish to offer help, no reason. My feelings are that when I was younger, I was able to enjoy a lot of fun things in school because of teachers who didn’t mind putting in a little extra.

    25  Nowadays you get that less and less, and a lot of teachers stick to their contracts and won’t go the distance.  In many ways I don’t blame them, but in the process, the students really lose out because volunteerism is a vanishing art.

    26  Virtue, they say, has its own rewards.

    27  And punishments.

    28  But I don’t mind throwing myself out there. In the process, some of us also gain a lot that many others don’t, and that’s watching memories happen right in front of us, year in and year out.

    29  I get a stiff neck, sore feet, and letters from complaining parents, but I also know that ten, twenty, forty years from now, this will probably be remembered better than my finest lesson.

    30  And the majority of the students won’t even remember that I was involved.

    31  And in many ways, THAT is the best part of all of it.

    32  There are amazing teachers out there who read the DN on a daily basis, and I can guarantee that each one understands exactly what I mean by that.

    33  Anyway, it’s Halloween, and it’s time to howl.

    34  Enjoy your day, and especially enjoy your night.

    35  I’ll try to update the Heidi Chronz tonight or this weekend.

    36  Meanwhile, blast Werewolves of London, watch old movies, and goof on trick-or -treaters.

    37  It’s after midnight.

    38  Happy Halloween.

    39  Peace.

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    hallow 2 skeleton

     

  • rene 22 moneyrene 22 moneyrene 22 moneyRolling Stones $2500!!!!! Cha-CHINGGGG!!!!

    rene 8 dorothy and toto rene 9 toto

    PEACE<JOY<HAPPINESS!!!rene 20 toto rene 14 j geils band rene 7 springsteen

    rene 12 rolling stones

    rene 11 wham rene 6 U2 rene 6 U2 rene 3 foreigner  The Daily News

    Happy Birthday Rene!!!!!

    October 1 Autumn cool guy 1

    1  EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!

    2  Just a bit of reveling.

    3  It’s allowed.

    4  So yesterday I was talking with a couple of old geezers from the Turtle Island school of Now, and one fellow jocked about how the upcoming Foreigner tour was sponsored by AARP, which is a retirement program for old geezers.

    5  They gaffawed at the absurdity, stating that AC/DC was still on fire as well.

    6  There was a time when talk of Foreigner and AC/DC would have ignited a lust for gold in my white-boy American heart. When times were good, and we were all oh so much younger and youthful and more prone to beauty, we deified rock legends.

    7  I not only LOVED those bands, I also profited heavily on their concerts, often taking home anywhere from $1000 to $1600 per concert.

    rene 23  it buys happiness rene 23  it buys happiness

    8  ‘Cuz I wuz in da UNION mang.

    rene 2 AC DC

    9  Those grand Day-on-the-Green concerts worked magic for anybody and everybody who worshiped rock as the TRUEST form of getting up there with the Creator of the Universe and various seraphim.

     

    10  Absolutely SONIC concerts back-in-the day. And I was getting a pretty high-end 20% of the commish by selling what is now referred to as “merch”.

    11  In the bay area, we grew up with rock, and with making silvery coin off its indulgences.

    12  Peace, Love, and Profits.

    13  And next to the Band and their toadies, we were the next best paid recipients of all that glam.

    14  Now this was back-in-the-day.

    15  Or back-in-the-days.

    16  Not sure which.

    17  Didn’t matter. There was mind-control-gone-bonkers going on in those heydays.

    18  Only baby, I wuz in da UNION.

    19  So I got to work selling hats, shirts, posters, and all the other boushit that the masses would spend to see their favorite rockstars.

    20  Name the band, I made HUGE money off them. U-2, Pink Floyd,The Who, Journey, Foreigner, Bruce Springsteen, Van Halen, Nirvana,The Grateful Dead, Metallica, Toto, Wham!, New Kids on the Block, Old Kids on the Chopping Block, Duran Duran, J.Geils Band, Guns and Roses,The Rolling Stones, Santana, and on and on and on and on.

    21  Those were just off the top o’ my head. There were lots. And I got to work all of ‘em, cuz I wuz in da UNION.

    22  The money was absolutely ridiculous, and kept POURING in because we knew how to handle large amounts.

    23  In the early days, nobody really kept books. We’d just work our asses off and trust that whatever they told us we made wuz what we made.

    24  Cash.

    25  Taxes? We filled out some half-page form that never really came back to us.

    26  We didn’t really even ask why it never seemed to be recorded in our income tax.

    27  We’d just be given what I used to call an “accordian of money” consisting not of ones, fives and tens, but of 20′s 50′s and 100′s.

    28  About ten inches when you accordianed ‘em.

    29  We’d go count it and see that we had made $1200, or $1150, or $1575, or in the case of the Rolling Stones, $2500 in two days.

    30  VERY often we’d be short, at least according to our own calculations.

    31  Nobody ever said a word.

    32  The small team would sometimes be anywhere from $600-$800 short, and NOBODY would say a word.

    33 Why would we?

    34  Skimming from the top? Maybe. Someone sure was, but to us regular workers, we weren’t about to bring any of that up. Some guy hands you $1700 cash in a paper bag and tells you to have a cold beer and go home, you do.

    35  A few old geezers would look at everybody askance, but to the normal guy, we’d just wanna go home, have a cold beer and a Jack Taco and count our blessings.

    36  Literally.

    37  Yesterday after a long, LONG day helping out with our night rally, I got home to an envelope from Centerplate, the newest executors of our splendid gig. I worked the Giants/Yanks last year for these guys, who are pretty sharp and with it.

    38  It was a note that I had been fired from the company for non-payment of union dues.

    39  Well, just recently the Teamsters took over our union. In the past several years, the good days ended, commisions dropped dramatically, and I became their guy who would set up new stands to see how the public would react.

    40  I had previously been “grandfathered” for Niner games, being consistently offered stands that would make anywhere from $400 to $800 on a single game.

    41  Now I was experimenting with making MAYBE $100 and working twelve hours.

    42  Glory Days.

    44  So my priority for paying dues dropped to about zero. They were right. The last game I worked was the Giants/Yanks, and I made out okay, but nothing remotely close to the Glory Days. I consistently made a grand every time either the Stones or Springsteen would roll into town.

    45  No more.

    46  So I’m thinking of giving some money to the retirement fund and hitting some winery in search of Foreigner, or AC/DC.

    47  Glory Days.

    48  Moving on; Back on Top:  Yesterday the Heidi Chronz completely rocked. I was in the theater and the students just reeled and rolled with the stories, finishing me off with rousing rounds of applause.

    49  What I thought for a while was a tumor in my head shrunk to nothing and I realized it was simply that I had slept wrong. Glorious sessions each period.

    50  Had a rally last night, which was bad and then good, but came home in a SWEET mood.

    51  So the end of yet another great day, and to that I say, happy birthday Rene, to a long and lasting go of it. You da best mang!

    52  Peace.

    rene 1 snow

    ~H~

    rene 19 grateful dead

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  • heidi 3 skeleton The Daily News

    heidi 1 atfnl haunted house

    1  Happy Wednesday!

    2  Nothing, nothing at all.

    3  How’d it ever come to this?

    4  In this age of Ted Nugent and Joe the Plumber seeking political office, I find meself backing off and watching all the insanity take place.

    5  Sharks won. Thats a nice reality, ain’t it?

    6  Nugent. Puh-leez. How about a Nugent-Palin ticket?

    7  Whew.

    8  I’m in the whirlwind of Spirit Week.

    9  I was asked to help out with the sound system, but naturally it always climbs into more than that.

    10  I must confess this time around that the students are really amazing.

    11  Without really any overall supervision, they’ve managed to have a Spirit Week running well, including a night rally tonight.

    12  They’ve got cars, fireworks, and all sorts of other suprises.

    13  Pretty incredible, if you ask me.

    14  Moving on:  Meanwhile, back in the Cathedral atop the Chill on the Hill, I’m getting ready for my annual Heidi stories.

    15  How did I prepare?

    16  Ha!

    17  By taking a nap.

    18  Has anything happened so far?

    19  Nah, not really.

    20  Yesterday morning I started the day telling the students about ghosts and all, when in an instant every light in the room blacked out, except one.

    21  We all stopped. Every light would have been easy to explain.

    22  One still shining was a bit scary, especially when I had just started telling them about ghosts and all.

    23  Some fire alarm went bonkers, and everybody started to evacuate, but within a millisecond someone had come on the public address system and announced the alarm was false.

    24  How they KNEW that within a millisecond is a mystery to me.

    25  Anyway, when the heat died down, I gave a look up to the lights.

    26  Sheer coincidence.

    27  Nothing more.

    28  As usual.

    29  There will be more. The Heidi Chronz begin this morning, instead of on Halloween this year. I fully expect coincidences, although without Halloween proper we might not get as many as last year. But we will get some.

    30  As usual.

    31  Nobody will blink.

    32  Except for me.

    33  I’ll smile because at this point, Heidi and I are on the same page.

    34  She’s voting for Oback, for the record.

    35  Good kid.

    36  I’ll keep you posted.

    37  Hopefully the won’t cart me off.

    38  We’re both actually more sane than most.

    39  Have a great Wednesday.

    40  See ya soon!

    41  Peace.

    heidi 2 mirror

    Heidi the Doll, the central figure in the Heidi Room at the 2005
    ATFNL Haunted House in the good ol’ Y.B. Theatre
    .

    ~H~

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  • Happy Birthday Nicoley!!!!

    rr 10 coley boley macaroni

    …and now…

     rr 4 Hold out your hand, boy!  The Daily News!!!!!

    rr 7 Obama

    1  Wow.

    2  It just came over the airwaves that some crazed skinheads planned on beheading a bunch of people and then attacking and assassinating Barack Obama.

    3  Funny thing is that the other morning of KGO they also mentioned the fear of assassination, and how people all over were having “funny feelings” about it.

    4  I read the article and a whole bunch naturally didn’t add up. For one thing, the “facts” seemed awfully sketchy considering that they caught the guys AND had their names all over the place.

    5  Anyway, every time I see people who are nutso beyond any normal person’s comprehension, I question it. After years of watching the dissembling antics of the media and power elite, I tend to look at most of those stories as highly suspect.

    6  Naturally there is a very real tinge to it, and we’ve had no shortage of wackos in our age.

    7  Election time, let me tellya. There always seems to be some strange shenanigans afoot every time we try to rid the house of the moneychangers, moguls and scoundrels who seem to always hold the nation’s keys. Sometimes I just pray that we could somehow do more…

    rr 8 moneychangers

    8  I’ll back off; I’m just saying the story sounds staged and fake. I’m sure they plucked a couple of loose cannons and locked them up, but the whole thing looks shady to me.

    9  But the unspoken fear has of a sudden manifested itself right before the election.

    10  Fancy that.

    11  I’ll stand down at this point, but I’ll bet I wouldn’t need to go far to find out that there’s more to this story than meets the eye. Mark me.

    12  Moving on: Hey sports’ fans. Did you catch the Singletary/Davis Show the other day? First, the new coach sat J.T. O’ Sullivan’s butt right down on the bench after his four millionth fumble. Then he booted Vernon Davis outta the game for being an imbecile.

    rr 3 scolding!

    13  I heard O’ Sullivan went home and offered to do the dishes for his wife, and that SHE ran him out of the house for dropping all the plates.

    14  Davis got spanked like a red-headed schoolboy.

    15  What a sideshow.

    16  Moving on, Part Two: Have y’all given any thought as to what you’re gonna be for Halloween?

    17  I stopped dressing up once I began to look like Ko-Ko the Intelligent Gorilla. I thought of just wearing a fur coat and calling it a day.

    rr 6 Mr

    18  Nah, for real though.

    19  I always worried that if I ever dressed up, that some kid would misbehave in my class, and I’d have to scold him while dressed like a gorilla or something.

    20  So I usually stay pretty normal, which is still pretty scary to most normal people.

    21  Moving on, Part Three: I went to get a haircut the other day and the barber said, “Which one?”

    22  <rim shot>

    23  Moving on, Part Four: I almost forgot to get this link out there, but Nathan sent it to me. I thought it was grand, because it is really an article about a guy most DN readers have run across at Joe’s, the immortal Randy Ritchie. Here’s the link from Metroactive.com:

    RR 1 rap
    Randy Ritchie holding court at Joe’s.

    http://www.metroactive.com/metro/10.22.08/cover-waiters-0843.html

    24  You have to scroll down a bit, but there’s a fun little piece about Ritchie, who is definitely his own person.

    25  Ah, I miss Joe’s. Haven’t traveled there in quite some time. You could still get there and enjoy food for a pretty reasonable price, especially if you order the soup!

    26  The garlic smells, the 40′s atmosphere, and the phenomenal waiters still move through the place with a little gangsta-meets-meatball style, with lots of sauce.

    27  And bread baked right on the premises at no additional charge.

    28  So a big shout out to Nathan for delivering the goods, and putting me muchly in the mood for some Original Joe’s.

    29  Been a while.

    30  I’d also like to send a HUGE happy birthday out to my WONDERFUL daughter Nicole. Go Sharks!

    31  Meanwhile, you all have a great day too.

    32  How could it not be great?

    33  Peace.

    ~H~

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  •  The Daily News

    Stooges 1 TGIF

    POIFECT!

    NYUK! NYUK! NYUK!

    1  Happy Frideeeeeeeeeeeeee!

    2  Moe’s face.

    3  If I’m not mistaken, the boyz are raising a glass of some sort of reserve Brandy, pretty good hooch back in the day.

    4  Someone needs to explain the celery though.

    5  In my chuggin’ days, I used to look a good deal like Moe.

    6  I had the same basic hair, when I HAD hair.

    7  When I had hair I looked kinda like this:

    Friday 2 George  

    8  Now I have hair that looks like this:

     Friday 4 Mr

    9  Only I’m twice as clean.

    10  Anyway, I don’t know about anyone else around heeyuh, but I’m sho glad it’s Fridee.

    11  Why, I can go out and howl at the moon tonight.

    12  And next week is Halloween.

    13  I haven’t really started doing the ghost stories yet, although in the background is the second season of Heroes, and there is evidently a character named Heidi on that show.

    14  And no, I haven’t gotten into Heroes yet, which is weird coming from a guy who LOVED comic books as a young lad.

    15  I’m notoriously slow at discovering things. I just recently discovered Sharpies, which I always thought were three Greek goddesses who dressed snappy.

    16  Nah, I’m exaggerating, but last night I couldn’t think of anything to put out there to the starving masses, so I thought I’d throw that in, just for ducks.

    17  Moving on: Is something odd going on with the word “love”? The other day I was in the vegetable section of Lucky’s and some goth chick kept saying, “Let’s get some salad, love. The lettuce is over here love. Should we get some carrots love?”

    18  I looked up from the detective novel I was writing and noticed that her “love” was some overweight slob with a bullet belt and a ring through his lower lip.

    19  The guy’s neck was stuck in low. He kept hovering over cantaloupes and melons, oblivious to everything she said. He had given up long ago.

    20  “So do you want mushrooms love? Do you think we should get some peppers love?”

    21  I SWEAR to you. I moved three aisles over, but somehow they kept finding me, and the only thing that would change would be the products coming out of her mouth.

    22  “Should we buy some pickles love? Do we need coffee love?”

    23  And on and on. The guy kept his neck looped down, and if he HAD a look on his face, I have to assume it was saying, “How do I get OUT of this?” He looked like someone had just taken the apple out of his lunch.

    24  Poor schlep.

    25  I left as swiftly as possible and forgot about it until yesterday.

    26  I went back into Lucky’s to see what I could get for a buck fiddy.

    27  Suddenly, some clerk asked another, “Do you know where this goes love?”

    28  Yeesh.

    29  Any guesses?

    30  Ah, who cares?

    31  It’s Fridee and we’re all saved, for a brief time anywayZ.

    32  Vote Yes on No.

    33  Have a poifect weekend.

    34  Peace.

    ~H~

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  •  

    broke 4 chaplin The Daily News
    broke 1 line

    1  Ah, nice to be right back into the pattern.

    2  Wake up, work, come home, collapse, sleep, wake up at some odd hour, write the DN, collapse.

    3  Sound familiar?

    4  Yesterday I actually broke through and managed to stay awake into the early part of the evening.

    5  Soon thereafter, I swiftly crashed, the DN turning the whole room blue when I awakened at half past one a.m.

    6  Oprah blared some show that evidently involved white people talking about steering children through hard times.

    7  She had some chipper gal chittering away about how lovely hard times are for families and homes.

    8  This lady clearly hasn’t worked a day in her life, and was SO annoyingly “hockey mom” that I wanted to throw a brick through the teevee.

    9  Her name was Susie.

    10  Oy.

    11  It was sponsored by some white girl whose parents bought her a “fuel-efficient” Ford focus.

    12  It also had commercials for Casio cameras, which had all white people with Osmond teeth taking pictures of each other smiling and laughing.

    13  Some black lady finally asked Susie if it would be a good idea to give her daughter a credit card.

    14  She interrupted, “Well GIRLFRIEND, be careful…!”

    15  I got the shakes, I swear to you.

    16  This lady LOVED smiling and telling everyone how tough times are, and how spoiled all the children are nowadays.

    17  I look at my own daughters, and I don’t see too much “spoiled” at all.

    18  They both work their butts off and try with every ounce of strength to fight through modern times.

    19  I’m proud of my daughters, Caitlin and Nicole.

    20  Maybe it’s because we always struggled.

    21  By and large, I’ve tried hard to steer clear of credit cards. In my earlier days I made the credit card idiocy mistakes.

    22  In my college days, I lived through a mini-depression when my dad’s work went on strike.

    23  I literally had to grow my own food and live on a shoestring. I wish I could tell people that I became thrifty and amazing with money, but I really never did.

    24  What I did learn was how to peel potatoes, to buy powdered milk, to shop at cannery outlets, and to make complete meals out of the same food for three days running.

    25  I managed to bicycle to school and work.

    26  So the sense of “entitlement”, while slightly there from my teenage years, never really moved into the realities of college life and subsequent younger years.

    27  One guy talked about how credit cards given to young people give a sense of free money.

    28  Yep.

    29  Every commercial involved spoiled white people going out to eat, playing Nintendo games,  and eating Yoplait with tiny spoons.

    30  Huh?

    31  Hard times?

    32  Some spoiled white girl came on in front of an antique chair and a vase of daffodils, and answered all of Oprah’s questions with statements? That sound like questions?

    33  It was downright surreal.

    34  The entire show was how white people with no struggles were managing. “Lexie”, the girl from Oxford, looked scrubbed and clean, and bragged about working hard all summer at her job by a pool. Her sandy-haired, blue-eyed dad watched proudly as every statement? Was a question?

    35  Out of ten commercials, I saw two black faces, one of whom was a happy, smiling successful gal, another being that of a doctor, followed immediately by a commercial for Whirlpool appliances.

    36  Buy a washer/dryer and new fridge.

    37  Hard times. Some lady came on talking about the dangers of West Nile, implying that now might be a good time to have your pool cleaned.

    38  Coming back from commercial, some mom was concerned that her child couldn’t go on a field trip to Puerto Rico. This gal was $20,000 in credit card debt, and the woman was worried her kid might get scarred for life if he missed this field trip.

    39  “He can’t go. Right audience?”  Oprah chided. Applause by design.

    40  Yeesh.

    41  In many ways, I wish I had those sorts of issues.

    42  Amazing.

    43  I don’t know about any of you, but that’s a world that is light years away from my own reality.

    44  Even the news went to scrubbed white people going to a clown convention in Mexico.

    45  I’m not sure where this was all going, but it was sure weird. The song “Everybody Loves a Clown” played under the segue, only it was in Spanish.

    46  Gary Lewis and the Playboys. How I knew that is beyond me, although I have no idea who did the Spanish version.

    47  I decided it might be good to report all this, and then conk out.

    48  If I’m going to hang out in dreamland, I’m probably better off getting some sleep.

    49  Work hard, and take care of things. Soup is good food. Don’t charge stuff.

    50  Accept all of this boushit as a challenge.

    51  I’m out. Sarah Palin just came on in a place she called “Glad City” and entered wearing millionaire clothing, with Queen’s “We Will Rock You” blaring through the speakers. Oy. Are these people remotely in touch?

    52  I ran out the door and to 7-11 to charge a bag of chips.

    53  This DN is brought to you by Country First, which I think is a powdered lemonade.

    54  Peace.

    broke 2 dust bowl

    ~H~

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  • tink 4 cool cats H   H H H tink 5 No on H

    Imbecile 2 

    H

    tink 1 Tinker Bell  

                 The Daily News

    1  I must first apologize to the bottom line of the DN recipients for yesterday’s faux pas. I somehow lopped the final line of recipients off, causing DN withdrawal, which is akin to either a morphine withdrawal, or perhaps a loftier euphoria, not sure which.

    2  Anyway, I’ll stay on top of it this time.

    3  And since yesterday, all SORTS of thundering news has broken.

    4  Never mind about us getting ripped blind by the Fed, or our war that is certainly there for the soldiers but not for everybody else, or even conspiracy theories that we are on the brink of a New World Order and are about to be enlsaved by ruthless bankers intent on installing microchips in our hands. Zeitgeist, I swear to you. But never mind any of that.

    tink 6 empty pockets

    5  Madonna and Guy are getting a divorce. And check it out:

    6  Sarah Palin’s daughters joined her on on 64 one-way and 12 round-trip flights since she was elected in 2006.  Her daughters, Bristol, Willow, and Piper (?) flew with their mama all over the place to the tune of $21,012, courtesy of the State of Alaska.

    7  Nobody is outraged. Nobody cares. Certainly not this guy.

    8  The only thing that bothers me is that Caribou Barbie named her daughters Bristol, Willow, and Piper.

    tink 3 bristol  

    Bristol.

    tink 3 bristol

    Willow (I’m pretty sure.)

    tink 3 bristol

    “The Pipester”

    9  Forget the cash; by the time she gets elected to the second-highest office in the land, cash will be worthless.

    10  Hey, some commercial on teevee just flashed “No on H”.

    11  Thank goodness. I didn’t want the job anyway.

    12  I’ve been nominated and I guess therefore automatically elected to TWO different things in the past week.

    13  I was told to report to Spirit Week practices every night until Halloween, and just today I was informed that I am also on the negotiating team for the teachers.

    14  AND I just received a jury summons.

    15  For a guy who spends most of his time hiding in a Cathedral, I stand in awe at my own importance. Or more accurately, my ability to be a sucker.

    16  I never asked nor even volunteered for these honors, which really translate to all sorts of meetings and extra work, and nowadays time has become golden to me.

    17  So no thanks, folks. I’m amazingly honored, but I already offered most of my life to education. I’d like to take a break from education and go into a classroom and teach.

    18  Moving on: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! First Wendy of hamburger fame became animated. Then she started TALKING!  I couldn’t BELIEVE that one. Wendy isn’t supposed to even MOVE if you ask me.

    tink 2 wendy's

    19  The first time I saw her move her head I waited to see it do a 360. I thought I was watching a haunting.

    20  And NOW I just saw that Tinker Bell not only has her own DVD, but that she TALKS!

    21  NOOOOOOOOOOOO00!

    22  The best part of Tink to me was that she was magically silent, like Chaplin, Keaton and Teller.

    23  Sometimes when I awaken, I see things like that and want to pull the covers back over my head and sleep.

    24  Actually I’ve reached a nice time in life when I don’t let too much bother me. So yes, Tink talking is another lame attempt to alter things that once were precious, but such is the times in which we live.

    25  If Tink talking or Wendy’s possession are the worst things going on in my life, then I think I’d better smile and count my blessings. If that’s the worst of my troubles, the I got no troubles!

    26  That “No on H” thing came on again, and there are all sorts of people who don’t want to elect me.

    tink 5 No on H

    27  Thank God.

    28  I’m enjoying smiling over things.

    29  You get that way.

    30  Live life, love life.

    31  Stop trippin’.

    32  Look at the stars.

    35  Peace.

    tink 8 mickey

    ~H~

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  •  
       October 3 Firenze
     The Daily News
     
    October 1 Autumn

     
    1  Ah, October! 

    2  I always love the clove of seasons…until  the first winds.

    3  It’s always so beautifully poetic until I look outside and see forty billion leaves all over the place.

    4  Autumn leaves are like a beautiful dame. They look flashy and gorgeous, but they’re a pain in the ass to maintain.

    5  M’bad.

    6  I think I’ve seen one too many of those Indiana Jones ads.

    7  Which right reminds me, just about every single Thursday I see some new movie advertised, and I always say, “I really wanna SEE that.”

    8  But when Friday rolls in, I want to go home, fall on the couch, and sleep until midnight.

    9  I LOVE sleep.

    10  People tell me that I waste a bunch of time napping and all, but to me, it’s a good investment.

    11  At my age, doing anything all day is pretty tedious, even if it’s going to a movie, or taking a ride. At some point, I wanna pretty much lie down and get into a zone.

    12  “But you miss out on SO much of life when you sleep!” I’m told.

    13  Meh.

    14  I live plenny o’ life.

    15  Because you see once I’m rested, I’m a tiger.

    16  For at least five minutes.

    17  Then I yawn the way tigers do when they’re sleepy.

    18  And in time, I’ll again take a snoozer.

    19  Never-ending battle.

    20  I watch freshmen at the end of the day and it’s uncanny how they can bounce into a room all full of vim and vinegar.

    21  Little pistols, I tellya.

    22  I find them pretty amusing actually.

    23  Moving on:  So…Mr. Blackwell walks into a bar…

    24  Hey, maybe Mike Nolan could get the job.

    25  M’ WAY bad.

    26  Mr. Blackwell was a clothes critic who was mean to celebrities. I  never really DID understand the guy, or how he ever got famous.

    27  But then I’m a pretty snappy dresser, as any foo knows.

    28  Nolan is the former head coach of the 49ers as of yesterday.

    29  He IS a snappy dresser. Lousy coach, but a pretty good dresser.

    30  That’s the best I can say about the guy. I wish him luck.

                                                                                   

    October 4 Florence



    31  Well now, Trami wrote me all the way from Florence last week and put in a good word for Tuesdays, claiming that SHE feels Tuesday is a great day, so immina go into today with a new attitude and a smile. I might even stop somewhere for some Tiramisu and coffee.

    32  Here’s the Moody Blues, aka The Sistine Chapel of Rock:

    October 2 Sistine Chapel



    34  There’s actually a longer version that is pretty fun:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GEMuAnFH_lM

    Might as well throw in Nights in White Satin:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G0rEInvje18&feature=related

     

    35   Hope the songs go well with your Tuesday.

    36   Thanks Trami. Maybe you opened a lotta eyes.

    37    Peace.

    ~H~

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  •   The Daily News

    appliances 4 guy and horse

    1  XXXXXXXXXXX  Q. What’s this?

    2  A.  The NFL defense plan for any team playing the 49ers.

    3  As long as we’re on football, I must say that yesterday was the first time I’ve actually rooted for the Raiders and for their fans from the beginning of the game ’til the end.

    4  ‘Bout time.

    Moving on: Yesterday I goofed on how many household appliances talk to me.

    appliances 1 happy

    6  No, don’t go running off.

    7  I don’t even have things REALLY talking to me yet. I can’t afford any of those things.

    8  But my refrigerator definitely nags me.

    9  That was when I began to notice.

    10  My refridge makes this little beeping noise, like a truck backing up, each time I leave the door open.

    11  The thing about it is, the design of the door makes it so it stays open. I think some practical joker designed it because for the good part of my life, I have rarely left a refrigerator door open.

    12  But I use the exact same little shove I’ve always given to all my refrigerators, throughout my entire life. Most times it’s sufficient.

    13  Not with the new one though.

    14  Every other shove doesn’t close it. So it talks to me. It says, “Beeep, beeep, beeep.”

    15  And I enjoy cooking, but it gets ridiculous when things start bubbling, boiling and all the rest and every five minutes you hear what sounds like a garbage truck backing up in your kitchen.

    16  Other things talk to me too. My iPod dock “boops” any time you plug in or remove the power cord.

    17  The microwave “dings”, the toaster pops, and the oven gives two beeps when it’s pre-heated. The phone goes into cardiac arrest if left off the hook. But that doesn’t happen often.

    appliances 2 phone

    18  The refrigerator, on the other hand, does. I’m convinced that the refrigerator is the most obnoxious. By and large, with the exception of the phone, the others are set, so you’re expecting them. It just decides to say, “Listen mister, you forgot to close me A-GAIN! So I imagine that for the rest of your life I’m going to do this to you until you LEARN.”

    19  I’m guessing I’ll adjust within a year or two.

    20  In the meantime, I guess I’ll just put up with a naggy appliance until I learn to throw that door a little harder.

    21  And so it’s Monday morning.

    22  You know the drill on Mondays.

    23  Fly low.

    24  Peace.

    appliances 6 fly low

    ~H~

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  •    The Daily News

    ag 2 mom

    1  Wow, people are so broke that they can’t even afford to file for Chapter 11. They’ve had to drop the Chapter to Chapter 7.

    2  Ironically, Chapter 7 is usually the deciding chapter on most books for me.

    3  Jessica Aguirre of NBC News has lips that look amazingly like pumped-up tractor tires.

    Ag 1 jessica aquirre

    4  That’s why I don’t  pump up my lips, that AND the fact that I would probably smash them into a sharp tree branch, causing me to flip crazily through the puffy clouds like renegade balloon.

    5  Wow.

    6  So…two days in a row life stopped me from hitting a Pho spa. Yesterday I had to leave instantly after school because my mom had to go in for her five-billionth surgery, or procedure, or whatever you call it.

    7  I clearly didn’t mind no Pho, because I dropped everything in life to get up there and be with her. Glad I did. She pulled through beautifully and was joking around with all of us last night.

    8  My mom always amazes.

    9  My dad has gotten so used to this stuff that he decided to have a couple of procedures yesterday at the same time. Hey, might as well.

    10  By the end of the day, mom was fine and dad couldn’t get in for one of them, but he did have a shot. When we got back, we simply talked about all the whack people in the waiting room, and managed to laugh into the evening.

    11  And all of us thanking someone for giving us such a grand night.

    12  So say whatcha will, Ma will always trump Pho.

    13  For all the whitewashed out there, “Pho” is a slant-rhyme to “Ma”.

    14  AnywayZ hopefully I could rebound from all of the insanity of the past few days and finally relax.

    15  Wouldn’t you THINK that relaxing would be easy?

    16  Moving on: Anybody see the Red Sox game last night?

    17  Amazing.

    18  Moving on, Part Two: The Prop 3 commercials with a bunch of discordant kids singing John Lennon’s Imagine has got to go.

    19  Some commercial for Morning Light just appeared. Just as I wrote the word “imagine” (see above) the guy in the commercial said the word “imagine”.

    20  If the ads play, you’ll hear it.

    21  Ah, October!

    22  Hold onto your hats.

    23  It’s gonna git crazy.

    24  Well, time for a nice hot cuppa and to stretch the weekend out as fur as it’ll go.

    25  You enjoy your weekend. Call your mom, if she’s still around.

    26  Gottago.

    27   Peace.

    ~H~

    cool guy 1

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