December 6, 2006
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The Daily News
1 So I was watching a great episode of House last night when some commercial came on with the Claus’, Santa and Mrs.
2 I was pretty much playing a little guitar, half-watching, half not, when Mrs. Claus addressed Santa as “Kris”.
3 I thought that was great, never thought of him as being named Kris. But then he isn’t Kris Claus, he’s Kris Kringle, and I’m not so certain I’m even spelling that correcty.
4 And his name IS Santa, not Kris. Actually, Nicholas, or Nick. But I thought it was cool anyway, just goofing on Santa Claus’s first name actually being Kris. Maybe it’s Mrs. Claus’ pet name. Mrs. Claus, so far as I know, has no first name.
5 Interestingly, the night before last I got a My Space friend request from a guy named Kris. Ah, nothing like a little dose of synchronicity.
6 And then last night, my dear old friend and confidant Geoff, of the infamous and famous rock band Daffy and the Ducks, told me he knew Santa Claus personally. I was Daffy, by the way. Front guy. Geoff was an awesome guitarist, and still is. We still jam any time we can get together.
7 AnywayZ, I asked if i could print our series of exchanges and then went ahead and did so anyway, because I needed to get to sleep, but I thought the series of e-mails was pretty fun to share. I don’t think Geoff would mind, and I don’t think Stan Nichols will either, because, well…read on. It’s written in non-capitals, e-mailese. Here ya go:
8 From Geoff:“i actually know santa claus…he lives in main, and runs
a chimney sweeping business the rest of the year. he brings megifts of perfect peace whenever i visit, and shoots a mean game of
pool.
“he also enjoys a vodka gimlet from time to time.
and he really likes cookies. a lot…
i’ll put in a good word for ya, if ya like…”9 From Me:“half a minute. you’re not in maine, right? anyway, yeah put
in a good word.
“i’ve gone totally commercial now, a complete
sell out, so that 50 -inch plasma teevee
at wal-mart would be just the ticket for a
cheery season, at least for me.”
cheerio,
daff10 From Geoff:“santa claus is stan nichols, st. nick’s chimney service
and masonry.
“synchronicity…stan nichols…st. nicholas…you can’t make
that shit up…
“he has a big white beard, white hair in the classic vonnegutstyle (vonnegut is dark haired, but you get the image) and thin, not fat like all the santa claus advertising.”
; )
A Kurt Vonnegut Self-Caricature11 From Me:“haha, that’s amazing…stan nichols…ya just get miracle on
34th st. stuff outta that one. any pictures of the fellow?”
daff12 From Geoff:“no unfortunately.
he looks like a skinny santa claus.
“if i did move to maine, i’m guaranteed a job with him.”13 The funny thing is, I think Geoff was being serious. He was actually a chimney sweep a few years back, you know, chimney sweeps, like Burt in Mary Poppins? I don’t know that Geoff and his fellow sweepers ever popped out of chimneys and did rooftop dances, but it does add a bit to the magic of the story…
Dick Van Dyke, Julie Andrews ,Karen
Dotrice, and Matthew Garber enjoy the
rooftop dance in Mary Poppins.14 Anyway, I’m enjoying the fact that someone I know may just be in touch with the very real Santa Claus. The story is as plausible as plausible can be.
15 When I was a lad, I used to love looking up in the sky on Christmas Eve and wondering if the airplanes were actually the sleigh, and the blinking lights Rudolph’s nose.
16 One year I had awakened at around 2 in the morning and heard jingle bells on our roof. It may very well have been my dad, but I remember putting my head under my covers, hiding a huge grin. It was awfully tough getting back to sleep, but the miracle of that night was absolutely magical.
17 So Geoff, if even half of what you say is true, if you were, indeed, serious, then put in a good word for the plasma teevee. I’ve been good this year, and as you well know, I’m not always.
18 Or actually I’d just settle for a Martin guitar, any sort, just expensive.
19 Peace.~H~
