November 30, 2006
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11/30/06 MaximizeThe Daily News
They’re everywhere…1 I think I’m reaching a comfort zone with idiots.2 It’s utterly amazing.
3 A career in education, I ask you.
4 Highwire acts of sheer lunacy. Daily basis.
5 I’m thoroughly convinced that a saucer of some sort hovered over the Earth for awhile, later lowered one of those rope ladders, and a whole bunch of strange creatures invaded our schools.
6 They walk around like they are normal, but suddenly, and without warning, you look up and somethin’ ain’t right.7 Somethin’ ain’t right.
8 Around a month ago I accidentally wandered into some classroom or other, thought I was walking into a storage room.9 I looked around, and it was like all this huge machinery surrounding me. Huge, unidentifiable stuff, like some mad scientist’s lab, only crammed with all these odd- looking machines.
10 I honestly thought it to be a storage room for huge, odd-looking machines. Suddenly this voice just boomed, “WHAT DO YOU WANT?”
11 I looked all around, and right smack-dab in the middle of this room was this lady’s head, talking. It took me a minute to see that it was connected normally to shoulders and things, because she just blended in.
12 I was taken quite aback, and looked around as though a voice in my head was whispering, “Is she talking to me?”
13 The voice became louder, like Oz or something. “WHAT DO YOU WANT?” The “T” in “WANT” was to-the-tooth perfect.
14 I again didn’t say anything, staring as if she were a twelve-headed Medusa.
15 “WHAT DO YOU WANT?” This smarmy miss meant business this time, so I stopped spacing out long enough to deliver an answer. I wanted to say, “World peace.”
16 But discretion again became the better half.
17 “I, uh, was looking for a storage room.”
18 “FOR WHAT?”
19 “Oh, I just saw some things that needed storage and…”
20 “WELL THERE’S NO STORAGE HERE! AND WHY DIDN’T YOU ANSWER RIGHT AWAY? I ASKED YOU THREE TIMES WHAT YOU WANTED!”
21 Again, me with the thoughts, “What do I want? Hmm. Uh…you dead?”
22 I just said thank you and went on my merry way.
23 Whatever IT was returned to whatever IT was doing, VERRRY Jabba-con-Hookuh.
24 But my friends, that was but the tip. True story. I swear on a stack of pancakes.
25 I’m thoroughly convinced they’ve landed. Social wackos.
26 Ain’t no luck.27 I learned to duck.
28 I may just take the day off and re-group.29 Careful whom you talk to.
30 They’re everywhere. Your job. Your life. Your classroom. Your car.32 They’re everywhere.33 Learn to duck.
34 Peace.~H~
Comments (2)
Yup, learn to duck or act like Michael Douglas in Falling Down.
Still one of my favorite movies (for obvious reasons)haha. Most people of a certain nature should not breed, but they do. In large quantities at that.
Go figure. ::shrugs:: haha
hey there! great hearing from you. so they’re all over you as well! when we gonna go have stahbux? it’s two yearsnow! haha,thanks,~H~