MaximizeThe Daily News
WARNING! THIS EDITION OF THE DN MAY BE TOO HOT
TO HANDLE!!! THIS IS JUST A WARNING, BECAUSE IT’S GOING TO
END WITH SOME SUPER HOT PICS !!!
IF YOU POSSESS ANY FORM OF MORAL RECTITUDE,
TURN BACK NOW!
IF YOU ENJOY THAT SORT OF THING, WELL SHAME ON YOU!!!
NOW READ ON!!!
Sam Sheepdog and Ralph Wolf,
who bears an uncanny resemblance
to Wile E. Coyote
1 Oh ye of little faith.
2 I have no idea what caused that outburst, but I just finished this tedious job, and I’m feeling
pretty awesome.
3 I can’t wait to go into work, because I totally worked all weekend to get things where they need to be.
4 But you know, Sunday nights have a way of causing some angst. Actually, I think Sunday DAYS do that more, like you have all this horse manure to take care of by Monday.
6 It’s like a huge woman in spandex. Fifty pounds of sugar in a five-pound bag.
7 Well, you know what I mean. It’s way more than you need to be looking at.
8 Perhaps this picture might better illustrate when you have WAY more of something than you ever want to even think about.
Ooooo, girllllllll!
m’bad.
9 Okay, so that was going a bit TOO far to make a point, but admit it. You probably almost had your coffee go through your nose on that one.
10 Ah, the DN stoops to a still greater lows.
11 Haha!!!
12 I had popped something into Google about spandex, and that picture came up. I was floored! All you moralists out there ought really to get a helmet.
13 Maybe it’s because the Stones are in town. This would be right up Mick’s alley.
14 Moving on: So when I first started writing tonight, I was thinking about how it is on a Monday going into work. It reminds me a LOT of that Warner Bros. cartoon in which Ralph Wolf, clearly a take-off on Wile E. Coyote only with a red nose, and not as intellectual, and Sam Sheepdog, a dog whose job is to protect the sheep, go to work in the morning.
15 I always loved that cartoon, or actually series of several, because they are so polite to one another in the morning, when they meet at the time clock to punch in to work:
Sam and Ralph punch
the time clock.
16 Their day begins cordially with Ralph saying calmly and amiably, “Mornin’ Sam.”
17 To which Sam replies, “Oh, good mornin’ Ralph.”
18 After that it’s a series of Ralph trying to kill the sheep with Acme products, and Sam calmly stepping in and not only preventing Ralph from achieving his devious chore, but clobbering him in various ways all day.
19 At the end of an entire day of this, the two walk slowly up to the timeclock, and say things like, “Well, g’night Ralph.”
20 Ralph, usually disheveled and with two black eyes, calmly replies,”Night, Sam.” And they go home, presumably to return the next day for more of same.
21 And for the life of me I have no idea why I’d bring that up late, late on a Sunday night, just so people can grab a coffee and read the DN, but lately, it feels that each day seems to run right along those lines.
22 For those of younger years, Sam made a cameo in the great film Who Framed Roger Rabbit, and both appeared in the 2001 Playstation Video game called Sheep Raider, or Sheep, Dog, and Wolf, produced by Infogrames.
23 That was just for the record.
24 And was Jessica Rabbit WAY hot for a cartoon, or was I just imagining things? Nah, she was definitely hot. Here, you be the judge. I got a saloon to run. Don’t say you weren’t warned. Here’s Jessica Rabbit in all her splendor!!!
Ain’t she sweet?
See her walkn’ down the street?
Now I ask you very confidentially:
Ain’t she sweet?
25 This edition of the DN goes out to our troops over there in Iraq. You guys could probably use Jessica about right now!!!
26 And with that, I’m jumping the heck outta Dodge.
27 And for the readers of the DN, fear not, it’ll cool down by tomorrow! I just thought we’d so a tad south today, no reason. The Toons started it, and Jessica ended it! Actually, those booty chicks
“ended” it pretty early! Again, m’bad.
28 I’m outta here; this was just a little TOO over the top!
29 And troops, hang in there guys!
30 Peace, and I mean that in a good way. Here’s Jessica, one more time. Give it up!
~H~
Ya gotta love it!
coldshowerproductionsltd.
Ooooo, girllllllll!m’bad.9 Okay, so that was going a bit TOO far to make a point, but admit it. You probably almost had your coffee go through your nose on that one.
